Re: REASONS TO KILL YOURSELF

From: "duke96" <duke96@flash.net>

Date: Sun, 11 Oct 1998 00:00:00 +0000

And the number one reason to kill ourselves....... (drum rolling)........

WE DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO COCK-SUCKERS LIKE YOU! THOSE WHO REFUSE TO ACCEPT
THE LIGHT OF THE LORD SHALL BURN BY THE LIGHT OF THE LORD!

John264773 wrote in message <19981009161127.10310.00008567@ng16.aol.com>...
>
>Reasons to Kill Yourself
>
>You gotta go sometime.
>
>There is no God; so if you were just trying to get into heaven with Brownie
>points, you may as well give up now.
>
>Nobody loves you, and no one ever will.
>
>Just think of the mess those assholes you leave behind will have to clean
up!
>
>You'll be one of those lucky few who get to know exactly when and how
they're
>going to die! (This works for hostages as well)
>
>Dead people don't have to worry where their next meal is coming from.
>
>No more fucking family reunions.
>
>If you're clever about it, you can frame someone you hate for your murder.
>
>Blowing your own head off really breaks the ice on the city bus.
>
>If there's a band you really hate, leave their album playing on the
turntable.
>When the cops find
>it, that band will be in a world of shit. This is a really good prank to
play
>on Gospel ensembles.
>
>In the words of the late GG Allin, "Do not be cheated of your greatest
thrill."
>He would know.
>
>If you kill yourself near someone you have a secret crush on, he or she
might
>feel sorry for you and have sex with your corpse.
>
>Think of all the money you'll save everyone else on birthday presents!
>
>Maybe you can come back as a zombie and scare the bejeezus out of everyone.
Or
>at least get a religion started up in your name.
>
>If you claim to be the messiah right before you off yourself, a lot of
people
>will be very confused for the rest of their lives (see above).
>
>MORE SOULS FOR SATAN!! YUMMY!!!
>

References

REASONS TO KILL YOURSELF
john264773@aol.com (John264773)
Fri, 09 Oct 1998 00:00:00 +0000