Diplomacy zine -- Press From: Eric_S_Klien@cup.portal.com Date: Thu, 06 Jul 1989 00:24:40 +0000 Issue #77 of ELECTRONIC PROTOCOL: Summer '10 of the game PANZER (BNC number 1989H) Germany retreats A KIE-BER. Spring '06 of the game MAELSTROM (BNC number 1989AA) GERMANY AND TURKEY CONTINUE TO GROW! ENGLAND: F NTS SF ECH-LON, F ECH-LON, (A PIC-PAR), (A GAS-MAR) (F POR-SPA(nc)) FRANCE: F NAF-MAO, (A MAR SF WME-SPA(sc)), (F WME-SPA(sc)) GERMANY: F YOR-EDI, A LVP SF YOR-EDI, F NOR-H, F KIE-DEN, A BER-KIE (A BUR-PAR), A BEL-H, F HOL SA BEL-BEL, A MUN-TYR, A BOH-VIE A GAL SA BOH-VIE, A STP-MOS, A SEV-H ITALY: F NAP-TYS, F ROM SF NAP-TYS TURKEY: A RUM-BUD, A BUL-SER, A CON-BUL, (A VIE-H), A SMY-APU F AEG CA SMY-APU, F ION CA SMY-APU, F EME SF ION-ION F ADR SF ION-ION, F VEN SA SMY-APU, F GRE SF ION-ION GM Notes: Turkey must disband or retreat A VIE. VIE can retreat to TRI. Press: Vienna Beseiged by German Schizophrenics A large group of German mental patients poured across the border from Bohemia today. Clad only in white hospital gowns they streaked through the streets of Vienna and demanded to be seen by the many learned doctors in this city. One large group gathered on the steps of the Freud Institute and began a spirited debate with themselves. As the sun set in this evening they could be heard argueing with themselves, shouting, "Yes we do. No we don't. Yes we do." Germany commits an atrocity by building a ninth army! Does he not realize that the game sets only come with eight German armies? The ensuing chaos and confusion will surely be the end of civilization as it is now known. What was he THINKING?! What will we do? What can we do? Summer '06 of the game MAELSTROM (BNC number 1989AA) Turkey retreats A VIE to TRI. Spring '05 of the game RED STORM (BNC number 1989AB) (GM is MaryFW@cup.portal.com) Needs orders from one player, he will directly e-mail results to all players. (Note that we were using a two day deadline for this turn.) Fall '04 of D-DAY (BNC number 1989AW) (GM is Pav@cs.duke.edu/Paul Vick) Haven't heard from him, am attempting to contact him. Fall '03 of NAVARONE (BNC number 1989AX) (GM is Pwoodruf@orion.cf.uci.edu/Peter Woodruff) Fall '03 is due 10pm EST, Wednesday, July 5. Spring '02 of BLITZKRIEG (BNC number 1989HL) (GM is Dougi@astro.as.utexas.edu/Doug Ingram) Due next Sunday, clearing up e-mail problems as all players know. OPERATION OVERLORD: Autumn and Winter (BNC number 1989HM) (GMed by Davisje@crd.ge.com/Jon Davis) "All warfare is based on deception." - Sun Tzu, The Art of War, 500 B.C. Autumn 1901 Retreats: No retreats. Winter 1901 Builds: Austria-Hungary A Bud, A Tri England F Lon France A Par Germany A Kie, A Ber Italy A Ven, F Nap Russia A War, A Mos Turkey F Smy ======================== Europa Today =============================== (Reuters) Thessalonika, Greece. The Austrian government refused to comment on allegations by the Turkish Foreign Minister that Austrian soldiers vacationing in Greece were suppressing the rights of the Turkish minority present there. An unidentified Turk interviewed in Greece claimed, however, "Help! We're being repressed!" An Austrian hauptmann requesting anonymity countered, "Bloody peasants!" The Austrian military governor of Serbia was quoted as saying, "We deny allegations of civil rights violations against the Turkish minority in Serbia. There is no longer a Turkish minority present in Serbia." ==================== Berlin Today ==================== The German people are dissappointed in the Italian-French invasion of Munich. Reports of wholesale executions of thousands of unarmed citizens have been smuggled out of Munich, along with thousands of photographs of bodies lying in the streets steeped with blood. Thousands of buildings were destroyed by French shelling in a city that had no military presence whatsoever. Needless to say, the German people are outraged at Italy's tretchery and are demanding immediate action. In response, thousands of young men and women in Berlin and Keil have volunteered to the armed services in order to contain the carnage in Munich. Troops will march in the Spring to regain one of the crown jewels of Europe, Munich. In other news, compelling evidence suggests that both England and Germany were sent false messages from the Premier of Belgium inviting troops to aid in the defence of Belgium from possible agression from the French. It is unclear where these leters originated from, but fortuneately, the Belgium people are safe and secure now. Germany and England will continue to cooperate in defending estern Europe from French and Italian agression. In addition, we invite Turkey and Austria to join in an attack on Italy in the South. We are confident that the threat of the combined French and Italian forces will soon be expunged from the face of Europe. ===================================================================== Spring '01 of GETTYSBURG (BNC number 1989HN) (GM is Adams@multiflow.com/Steve Adams) Due July 9, 1989 Spring '01 of DRAGONSLAYER (BNC number not known) (GM is Genesch@aplvax.jhuapl.edu/Eugene Schwartzman) Due July 9, 1989 Spring '01 of DOUGHBOY (BNC number not known) (GM is Matt@oddjob.uchicago.edu/Matt Crawford) Due July 9, 1989 GM comments: If anyone knows how I can get direct Usenet access (that is bypassing Portal and Telenet) let me know. THE 1971 RULEBOOK By Eric Klien I received a rulebook copyrighted 1971 from John Richards/ Mcvax!ukc!praxis!johnr. Here are the difference between it and the 1976 rulebook that I reviewed earlier: 1) The words "the exciting game of international intrigue" are in bigger print but still in cursive. 2) The copyright notice is at the bottom of the page, not in the middle of it. 3) A larger typeface is used for the General Description text on the front page. (Therefore more lines are used since the size of the box is the same, limiting the length of sentences.) 4) There is no "No. 8916" printed in the lower right hand corner of the front page. 5) I am sure the back cover is different since the one I got was printed in London, I don't have the back cover for my 1976 rulebook. 6) The 1971 Rulebook is copyrighted by Games Research, the 1976 Rulebook is copyrighted by Avalon Hill. 7) The 1976 Rulebook tells you how much extra conference maps are and gives you Avalon Hill's address, the 1971 Rulebook gives you neither the price of extra conference maps nor the address of Games Research. And that's it! In other words, I believe that when Avalon Hill took over distribution of Diplomacy in 1976, they simply reprinted the rulebook to get their name and address on it. Note that I believe that Avalon Hill only publishes Diplomacy in the U.S., I believe that other companies control its distribution outside of this country. And for those who didn't read my previous article, the significant differences between the 1971 rulebook and the 1982 rulebook are that convoy rules XII.4 and XII.5 have been changed and rule XII.6 has been added in the 1982 rulebook. Oh, and for the record the 1976 rulebook was an improvement over the 1971 rulebook since it tells you where to get conference maps. (The 1966 edition contained this information, I wonder why it was left out of the 1971 edition?) Looking at the rulebooks that I have received so far, I have figured out that the reason that the 1982 rulebook says that it is the 2nd edition is because it is the 2nd edition put out by Avalon Hill. This has always confused me since there have been at least 4 significant revisions of the rulebook. Does anyone out there have a rulebook that is not copyrighted 1966, 1971, 1976, or 1982? If so, send it to me! Taken from THE POUCH #53: SOME THOUGHTS ON PRESS RELEASES By John Piggott Newcomers to this funny hobby sometimes get a little confused at what they find here. To be sure, the game moves are clearly necessary, and one might well expect to find zine editors printing comments on the play, or having arguments among themselves. But what possible purpose is served by all those funny press releases? Part of the confusion no doubt stems from the fact that there are several types of press releases. In their simplest form, they are merely an extension of diplomatic correspondence, and usually boring to read: VIENNA: The Emperor of Austria sends his compliments to the Sultan of Turkey and trusts their association will be a happy one. On occasions such releases, directly related to the game moves, can serve an essential purpose. Perhaps where there is a history of distrust between the communicating parties a well-thought-out press release, in conjunction with the orders for the same season, may pave the way towards an eventually fruitful alliance. I've found this useful in at least one game. But normally such releases should be kept out; the place for diplomacy is in letters. Press is, of course, much more interesting if there's more to it than more diplomacy. Occasionally, you may wish to insult your enemies: VIENNA: Sod you, Davidson! I should have known you'd stab me, you half-assed apology for a pox-ridden whore! Some editors, however, would decline to print such a release. One has a greater chance of reaching one's publich if the funny side of one's misfortuine is emphasized: VIENNA: The Austrian Government hopes that the Sultan is taking note of the imperialist moves of the Italian Cake-Mix company, Inc (Rome). This twister's stabbing is turning all our people into Viennese whirls... The pun, indeed, has a noble tradition in the story of press releases; and there are those who believe this kind of release to be the best sort. Why they're wrong we'll come on to presently; right now we'll just note that the newcomer shouldn't find any of the foregoing examples too hard to understand in the contexts of their games. But what is the neophyte supposed to make of a press releases which bears no relation to what's going on at the field of battle? Is there really a place for this sort of thing: TERMINUS CITY: "I am Hari Sheldon..." This isn't datelined from anywhere on the game board; and for all the relevance they have the moves might as well be ignored! Yet this sort of release comprises an important part of all the world's press, be this world Earth or Trantor. Why? The answer, of course, lies in the creative urge. Diplomacy players on the whole possess better imaginative powers than the majority of the population, and writing press releases from fictious locations is an easy way of constructing one's own universe. The private cosmos of a game's press is peopled with interesting or absurd characters, and the propaganda interactions in a game featuring good press writers can be a joy to behold. For another attraction of this sort of "creative" press is that one's own situations and characters may be developed further by another player in the same game (or even an interested outsider). One of the greatest pleasures to be obtained from postal Diplomacy is to see one's creations spread from player to player, from game to game, and eventually into different zines: JESUS COLLEGE: "What's the Hall dinner tonight?" "Crottled greeps." "Oh. Think I'll sign out." I didn't actually invent crottled greeps; I suspect nobody knows the culprit's identity. To me, however, goes the distinction of having introduced them to Diplomacy fandom. I first encountered them in SF fandom, where they are a mythical food served to fans, indescribably foul (if you don't like them, you shouldn't order them), and it was as such that I mentioned them in one of my press releases in MAD POLICY's game 1973D; it was my intention to use the fact of their loathsome taste in future releases. But what actually happened was that Conrad von Metzke took control of them, transforming the once-vile crottled greeps into a sought-after delicacy. Crottled greeps stalls proliferated all over Jamul, in a manner reminiscent of Colonel Sanders' fried chicken: ADDELSTONE: "...Piggott's opened a new crottled greepery and is advertising a special: four for the price of five." "Sounds like Piggott. Sounds like Richard, too; when he started MAD POLICY I told him it would be cheaper just to subscribe to ETHIL." And, as you see, this sort of release also provides an improved way of insulting one's enemies, as well as providing entertainment for the participants and (hopefully) spectators. This "non-game" press divides rather badly into two distinct types: these are, first, parodies of various books in the real world, and second, releases in which real and fictitious characters mingle, but without imitation of any existing work. I tend more towards the parody side, myself; my multifarious FOUNDATION parodies are justly notorious, and I've also imitated John Norman's GOR books and Norman Spinrad's THE IRON DREAM. Previous issues of ETHIL have contained parodies of Sheakespeare and Hemingway; and there have been other examples in other zines. Of course, sometimes it's difficult to know where these two types merge -- what is parody and what isn't? I'll leave that to the English students, being only an illiterate scientist myself, to answer. It might also be worth considering at a later date what makes a good parody -- since the degree of success of the various parodies in propaganda varies widely. Now, why is "non-game" press the best sort? The reason's simple: it's generally better. Game related press, after all, is somewhat limited in scope, and once you've exhausted the obvious punchlines, there may not be all that much left: VIENNA: Trade figures released today show record increases in the sale of ice-cream to the occupying Italian army. The Austrian Automobile Company of Budapest also reported record profits. In particular, sales of the new six-gear armoured car -- one forward, five reverse -- to the Italians are encouragingly high. See what I mean? Italian ice-cream in particular has featured, monotonously, in game after game, and after the first twently apperances it was difficult to hink of any new twists on the theme. That's one reason for my thesis that game-related press is a no-no compared with other sorts. A second reason is that the bit of the press which connects it to the game often doesn't add anything new: BUDAPEST: "Look at those crottled greeps! They've grown legs! Ugh!" "Must be greepy-crawlies. Incidentally, did you hear Piggot's offering four portions for the price of five?" "Yeah -- I wondered why Italy moved to Vienna." Big deal. You could make that crack without bringing in Italy at all. Well, if game-related press is so weak, where does that leave press in relation to the moves in a Diplomacy game. Yes, you're right; I believe the press to be by far the most important part. For a start, in the press releases you are interacting with seven people (six players and the GM) and possibly more, depending on reader interest and the GM's particular ruling with regard to non-player's press. I know that, in theory, the diplomacy should do the same thing ... it is supposed to be good policy for a player to write to everyone else at least once a move, but how many games find France and Turkey discussing anything before about 1905? Precious few, I should imagine. So that's one up for press already, since one of the good things about postal diplomacy is supposed to be interaction between the players -- a meeting of minds, so to speak. Secondly, the press is by far the most interesting part of a game report, if it's any good at all. Isolated voices will no doubt disagree with me here, saying that the moves of a Diplomacy game are both fascinating and of great sociological import -- but when was the last time YOU were turned on by Army Munich to Ruhr? Game moves are all very well if you're actually playing, or have the whole game to play through at once -- but one season's manoeuvres isn't guaranteed to produce a Pulitzer Prize, while press at its best is entertainment of great value. I know a Diplomacy player who spends literally hours each season pondering his orders in a postal Diplomacy game. I wonder why he bothers; if he's so concerned with brilliant tactical ploys he would surely be better off if he stuck to playing on hexagonal grids. Diplomacy, by its very nature, is rather a poor game for tacticians; the essential features in a postal Dippy game are the diplomacy and the press. They are of far more interest than the moves, and thus ought to receive a correspondingly greater attention. It's unfortunate, in my view, that the fundamental truth of this is not more widely realised. Taken from Carolina Command & Commentary #12: (A little dusty, i.e. about six months old, but I did spend the effort a couple of months ago to type it in.) Amnesty International reports that Czechoslovakia, East Germany, Bulgaria, and the Soviet Union all continue to violate human rights. The Bulgars beat up on ethnic Turks while the Sovs still have hundreds of dissidents locked up in "mental hospitals." Solidarity battles the Polish government again, even at odds with Lech Walesa himself. Meanwhile as Eastern Europe boils with discontent, Romania has declared that the maximum temperature for dwellings will be 64 degrees. This might help Romania with its chronic energy shortage (the Soviets "annexed" their oil fields) but it won't head off the self-immolation of socialism. Last month we told of Estonia rioting for independence from the Russian empire. Now they have taken the extraordinary step of declaring themselves able to veto any Kremlin edict not having to do with foreign affairs. This sounds a hell of a lot like the "Nullification" law in South Carolina that partially precipated the War of Northern Aggression here in the States. And this when Armenians and Azerbaijanis continue to massacre each other in a reprise of our own "Bloody Kansas" conflict of the 1850's. The only question is when and where the Soviet troops will decide to become a Fort Sumter, and start firing. Demonstrating that the Soviet Union hardly has a monopoly on ethnic strife in the Communist World, Yugoslavia is considering harsh penalites or even martial law to silence pockets of Serbian nationalism. Several weeks ago over 100,000 Serbs besieged Communist Party headquarters in the province of Vojvodina, forcing the entire local leadership to resign. A similar protest in Titograd was quelled only by riot police. Centuries-old mistrust among the six ethnic groups that make up the country was hardly ended by post-WWI Wilsonian "self-determination", post-WWII Communism, or the poverty all have shared so equally ever since. And so, once again, the Powder Keg smolders. I am enjoying moderating this zine, keep that mail coming! Eric Klien Up