Diplomacy zine -- EP #128 From: Eric_S_Klien@cup.portal.com Date: Sun, 07 Jan 1990 03:13:35 +0000 Issue #128 of ELECTRONIC PROTOCOL: ************************************ How does a Mutant Boss count to 100? On his fingers! ************************************ Chapter One contains: NAVARONE, BLITZKRIEG, OPERATION OVERLORD, GETTYSBURG, and HMS HOOD And is published by daybell@aludra.usc.edu/Donald Daybell Chapter Two contains: DRAGONSLAYER, BISMARK, COLD WAR, JACAL, and VERSAILLES And is published by tedward@cs.cornell.edu/Ted Fischer Chapter Three contains: TANNENBURG, VERDUN, ENTENTE, MULHOUSE, and DAWN PATROL And is published by dragon@agora.hf.intel.com/Bill Wheeler (He has been compiling the chapters but has so far been unable to get them back to me. We are working on the problem. This problem may not go away until the holidays are over. Unfortunately, all people who have volunteered to replace him can't start helping me until after the holiday are over. To put it mildly, I need more guest publishers!) ------------- Chapter Four ------------- Spring '05 of the game RATATOSK (BNC number 1989IJ) (GM is jall@diku.dk/Mogens Jallberg) Delayed due to Winter vacations. Spring '05 of the game BUSHIDO (BNC number 1989IN) (GM is ronin@cory.berkeley.edu/Sam Parazette) Due Jan 20 Spring '04 of the game HUGO (BNC number 1989IO) (GM is willis@trwind.ind.trw.com/Willis Marti) Due Jan 17 Spring '03 of the game JUGGERNAUGHT (BNC number 1989IR) (GM is rdesper@eagle.wesleyan.edu/Rick Desper) England France A Moscow holds [A Picardy -> Belgium] (Ger 1-2) A Edinburgh -> Norway [A Burgundy -> Munich] (Ger 1-1) F Norway ->Skag [A Marseilles S A Burgundy] cannot s moving A F Sweden S F Norway->Skag F Gulf of Lyon->TyS F Barents holds F Western Med S F GOL->TyS F North C A Edi->Nwy Germany Italy [A Berlin->Prussia] (Rus 1-1) A Tuscany holds [A Munich->Silesia] (Rus 1-1) A Tyrolia -> Piedmont [A Kiel->Munich] (1-1 self) A Venice holds [A Belgium S A Ruhr] (cut) [F Tyrrhenian holds] DISLODGED A Ruhr S A Belgium F Denmark holds Austria-Hungary Turkey A Vienna S A Serbia->Trieste A Rumania ->Ukraine A Serbia->Trieste] A Ankara ->Armenia A Gailicia S A Venice (?) A Albania S A Greece F Trieste->Adriatic Sea A Greece S A Albania F Ionian->Apullia F Aegean->Ionian Russia [A Warsaw ->Silesia] (Ger 1-1) A Silesia ->Bohemia [A Prussia ->Berlin] (Ger 1-1) Austrian orders, long: Dock repairs complete at last, the Great Austrian fleet takes a test cruise in the waters of the Adriatic sea. (F Tri-Adr) The Serbians, at last convinced of the superiority of olives from the Kaiser's personal gardens, are left to govern themselves for awhile whilst the army that was there goes to dig trenches in Trieste. (A Serb-Tri) The Mob of ralliers marching around the capitol finally gets their act together and starts to dig in while sending all her support caravans to Trieste temporarily. (A Vie S A Serb-Tri) The Galician army, thumbing its nose at the retreating Russian troops, makes a stand to keep Austrian soil Austrian. (A Galicia S A Ven) Press from Austria-Hungary: The Kaiser met the press today in order to quell rumors of a successfully working Italian transporter device purportedly able to move whole armies of men over vast distances in mere minutes. "No such device exists, and we doubt that such a device if it ever does exist will be invented by Italians." He went on to emphasize the importance of olives in ones diet over the consumption of pasta. The Austrian ambassadors to Russia were beating a hasty retreat when an invading English army kept Moscow under seige for several days. Unable to get the latest fashion information, the amabassadorial staff began to write a cheesy novel about life under the Two Flags of Moscow. After England successfully completed knocking on Moscow's gates, the ambassador to Russia quickly dubbed himself an impromptu secondary ambassador to England and set about announcing the Kaiser's pleasure in seeing England on the continent. And the "Bulgarian talks" continue as Turkish and Austrian lawyers and ambassadors hammer out a treaty, which the Kaiser has agreed to sign no matter how it turns out, saying, "certainly, I'll sign any treaty that shows the Sultan doesn't think my brains are Spam (tm)." Later in that same party, the Kaiser was conspicuously escorted away from the cat he was holding a coversation with. He denied being drunk and stood by every action he performed at the party. from England: The British Military Governor of Moscow today announced the immenant arrival of a new British cultural mission to Russia. The new mission will be headed up by Colonel Reginald McAlister of the Edinburgh Corps and will be stationed in St Petersburg. "The new St Petersburg office will play a vital role in providing mutual support for cultural activities in Moscow", said the governor, "we expect that it will be fully functional by Fall of 1903". (GM's notes) Clearly, A-H wanted to support his army in Vienna. I puzzled over what to do, be literal or interpretive. Considering that I'd just nailed Italy for trying to move to a non-bordering territory was one point in favor of declaring this an illegal move. On the other hand Ven looks like Vien, while noone could claim Gal meant Bohemia. It's unimportant anyhow, since only one foreign army threatened Vienna. final positions Eng: A Mos,A Nwy,F Bar,F Nor,F Ska,F Swe Fra: A Pic,A Bur,A Mar,F TyS,F Wes Ger: A Kie,A Ber,A Mun,A Ruh,A Bel,F Den Ita: A Pie,A Tus,A Ven,F ? A-H: A Gal,A Tri,A Vie,F Adr Tur: A Gre,A Alb,A Ukr,A Arm,F Ion,F Apu Rus: A Boh,A War,A Pru Italian fleet can retreat to Tunis,Naples, or Rome Retreat due, well, soon. I expect it to be waiting for me when I get back on January 22. Spring '01 of the game TOKUGAWA (BNC number 1989IS) (GM is joseph_harold_thomas@cup.portal.com/Joseph Thomas) Never published before. Here they are: France Turkey A Mar-Spa A Con-Bul F Bre-Mao F Ank-Bla failed/Sev bounce A Par-Bur A Smy-Arm England Italy F Lon-Ech A Ven-Pie F Edi-Nts A Rom-Tus A Liv-Yor F Nap-Tyr Germany Austria F Kie-Hol F Tri-Alb A Ber-Kie A Bud-Ser A Vie-Bud A Vie-Bud Russia F Stp-Gob A War-Gal A Mos-Uke F Sev-Bla fails/bounce Ank Positions France: A Spa, F Mao, A Bur Turkey: A Bul, F Ank, A Arm England: F Ech, F Nts, A Yor Italy: A Pie, A Tus, F Tyr Sea (sorry, not as clear in moves) Germany: F Hol, A Kie, A Ruh Austria: F Alb,A Ser, A Bud Russia: F Gob, A Gal, A Uke, F Sev any early stabs? Spring '02 of the game TOKUGAWA (BNC number 1989IS) (GM is joseph_harold_thomas@cup.portal.com/Joseph Thomas) sorry for the delay, holidays and stuff, someone please send Eric Klien a copy of the Spr'01 moves, thanks Fall"02 due Weds Jan 17th 12:01 AM Germany Austria A Mun-Boh F Alb-Gre A Bel-Pic A Ser S F Alb-Gre A Den S Eng A Nor-Swe A Bud-Gal A Ber-Pru A Kie-Ruh Turkey F Hol-Kie A Bul-Rum (fails 1:1 Russia) F Con-Bla (Fails 1:1 Russia) England F Smy-Aeg F Bre-Mao (fails 1:1 France) A Ank-Arm F Edi-Nws F Lon-Ech France A Nor-Swe F Spa(sc)-Mao (fails 1:1 England) F Nts-Ska A Por-Spa (fails, own unit doesn't move A Par S A Mar-Bur Italy A Mar-Bur A Pie-Mar A Vie-Tri F Tyrr Sea-Ion Russia A Tun-Naf F Swe S F Stp-Nor(cut,dislodged,retreat F Stp-Nor A Vie-Tyr A Ukr-Rum (fails 1:1 Turkey) A War-Ukr (fails, own unit doesn't move) F Sev-Bla (fails 1:1 Turkey) Final positions Germany: A's Boh,Pic,Den,Pru,Ruh F's Kie Turkey: A's Bul,Arm F's Con, Aeg England A's Swe F's Bre,Nws,Ech,Ska France: A's Por,Par,Bur F's Spa(sc) Italy: A's Mar,Tri,Naf F's Ion Austria: A's Ser,Gal F's Gre Russia A's Tyr,War,Ukr F's Nor,Sev, (Swe retreat, will report ASA recieved) questions/problems let me know ASAP sorry for the delay Joe Spring '03 of the game PETAIN (BNC number 1989IT) (GM is ssmith@ms.uky.edu/Scott Smith) Due Jan 7 Autumn and Winter '02 of the game DUNKIRK (BNC number 1989KN) (GM is sjzwange@phoenix.princeton.edu/Steven Jacob Zwanger) retreat: Russia: A War (from Gal) builds: Austria: A Vie England: F Edi France: A Par Germany: F Kie, A Mun Positions: Turkey: A Con, F Aeg, F Bla Russia: A Fin, F Swe, F Rum, A Ukr, A War Italy: A Ven, A Syr, F EMe, F Ion Germany: A Bel, A Hol, F Den, A Bur, F Kie, A Mun France: A Mar, A Pie, A Gas, F Spa(SC), A Par England: F Ska, A StP, F Nth, F Nwy, F Edi Austria: A Gal, A Ser, A Bul, A Bud, F Gre, A Vie Spring '01 of the game BIG WILLIE (MNC number not known) (Blind game, GM is okamoto@hp-ses.hp.com/Jeff Okamoto) Due Jan 19 Fall '05 of the game TRENCHFOOT (BNC number 1989IH) (GM was eric_s_klien@cup.portal.com/Eric Klien for one turn) (GM was tedward@cs.cornell.edu/Ted Fischer until Summer '05) Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All players have voted for a G/I/R draw. Please send me endgame statements immediately. And would tedward@cs.cornell.edu/Ted Fischer please send me a game summary for each year. (See houserules for format of summary.) Here are the orders received for the final turn: England(Elliott Klienrock): A Edi-H, F Ska-H, F Den-H, F Nts-H France(Jeff Mason): A Bur-H, A Pic-H, A Gas-H, A Bar-H, F Mao-H Germany(Mark Tyler): F Bel-Ech, A Ruh-Bel, A Mun-Ruh, A Ber-Mun, (A Kie-Den) F Hol SA Ruh-Bel Turkey(Joseph Thomas): (F Ank SF Con-Con) and must retreat (A Sev-H) and must retreat, (F Con SA Ank-Ank) Italy(Joe Dent): F Aeg-Smy, A Gre-Ser, A Ser-Rum, A Pie-Mar F Gol SA Pie-Mar, F Por SF Spa-Spa, F Spa SF Por-Por Russia(Rod Price): F Bla SF Arm-Ank, F Nor SA Fin-Swe, F Arm-Ank, (A Bul-Con) A Stp-Fin, A Fin-Swe, A Mos-Sev, A Ukr SA Mos-Sev SUPPLY CENTERS England: 4 Lvp, Edi, Lon, Nwy France: 2 Par, Bre Germany: 7 Ber, Mun, Kie, Vie, Den, Hol, Bel Italy: 10 Ven, Rom, Nap, Tun, Tri, Ser, Gre, Mar, Spa, Por Russia: 10 Mos, Rum, Swe, Bud, Sev, War, Bul, Stp, Ank, Sev Turkey: 1 Con Publisher comments: Quote taken from Sunsoft Game Time News Things are pretty quite during this holiday period. Although quite a few people have signed up for future games. I still need players for my gunboat, blind, 1914, and classic Diplomacy games. DIPLOMACY PLAYERS' TOP TEN FAVORITE LIES by Eric S. Raymond 1. I can't ally with you yet, I'm waiting to see things develop. 2. I'll keep my units out of there if you will. 3. Let's you and I clobber the rest of these losers and go for a two-way draw. 4. I'd like to help you out, but all my units are committed just now. 5. Gee, it's a shame my support wasn't sufficient for you to take that center. 6. I'll attack him as soon as I can bring another unit to the front. 7. That unit I just built on our common border will move away from you. 8. I'm sorry, but your letter arrived too late for me to change my orders. 9. I'm really sorry, I didn't want to attack you but I had no choice. 10. I only wanted that one center, honest! (The author is accepting nominations to fill out the top 20. Send yours via UUCP to eric@snark.uu.net or phone (215)-296-5718). MANUEL NORIEGA'S TOP TEN NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS from David Letterman 10. No more declaring war on really big countries. 9. Call that guy I know at Jacoby & Meyers. 8. Start brand line of pineapples. Get rich! 7. Send Hallmark's more expensive friendship card to President Bush. 6. Get New York City taxi license. 5. Find a travel agent who can work a little faster. 4. Get in touch with my last friend in the world -- Nicolae Ceausescu. 3. When all this is over, send Pope a thank you kilo. 2. Don't trust anybody talking about a "Kinder Gentler Nation". 1. Make reservation for Hell. Taken from Reader's Digest: After a preacher died and went to heaven, he noticed that a New York cabdriver had been given a higher place than he had. "I don't understand", he complained to St. Peter. "I devoted my entire life to my congregation." "Our policy is to reward results", explained St. Peter. "Now what happened, Reverend, whenever you gave a sermon?" The minister admitted that some in the congregation fell asleep. "Exactly", said St. Peter. "And when people rode in this man's taxi, they not only stayed awake, they prayed." I am enjoying moderating this zine, keep that mail coming! Eric Klien Up