Diplomacy zine -- EP #125 Chapter Four From: Eric_S_Klien@cup.portal.com Date: Sun, 24 Dec 1989 03:07:28 +0000 Issue #125 of ELECTRONIC PROTOCOL: ***************************************************************** A bottle of champagne was tallied and he signed the check despite her protests. It arrived in a colorful 'Drink While You Drive' basket, and they stood then, and she was tall, but he was taller. ***************************************************************** Chapter One contains: NAVARONE, BLITZKRIEG, OPERATION OVERLORD, GETTYSBURG, and HMS HOOD And is published by daybell@aludra.usc.edu/Donald Daybell Chapter Two contains: DRAGONSLAYER, BISMARK, COLD WAR, JACAL, TRENCHFOOT, and VERSAILLES And is published by tedward@cs.cornell.edu/Ted Fischer Chapter Three contains: TANNENBURG, VERDUN, ENTENTE, MULHOUSE, and DAWN PATROL And is published by dragon@agora.hf.intel.com/Bill Wheeler (He has been compiling the chapters but has so far been unable to get them back to me. We are working on the problem. This problem may not go away until the holidays are over. Unfortunately, all people who have volunteered to replace him can't start helping me until after the holiday are over. To put it mildly, I need more guest publishers!) ------------- Chapter Four ------------- Spring '05 of the game RATATOSK (BNC number 1989IJ) (GM is jall@diku.dk/Mogens Jallberg) Not Received Spring '05 of the game BUSHIDO (BNC number 1989IN) (GM is ronin@cory.berkeley.edu/Sam Parazette) Due Jan 20 Autumn and Winter '03 of the game HUGO (BNC number 1989IO) (GM is willis@trwind.ind.trw.com/Willis Marti) England:(5) F IRI F ECH F NTS F SKA A HOL Germany:(1) A KIE Russia: (9) F SWE F BLA F ANK A DEN A BER A BOH A MOS A WAR A STP Turkey: (0) Austria:(7) F CON A TRI A SIL A TYR A MUN A VIE A BUD Italy: (6) F NAF F WME F GOL F SMY A PIE A TUS France: (6) F MAO F BRE A BEL A MAR A SPA A PAR ===== Late publishing means some won't see this 'til they get back. Spring 1904 moves due 17 Jan, "Summer" moves will be due 21st, then back on regular schedule. ===== The Weekly Crier "All the News that Fits, We Print." ==================== Moscow - In a press meeting, Czar Rick warmly welcomed all the new Germanic people who had become new(someday equal) citizens of the Soviet empire. Czar Rick encouraged the new citizens to invite their relatives to join his people's growing nation. (Publisher note: GMs should remember that if a player disappears for even a day he should contact the player via phone or me if it is an international player so we can resolve the situation immediately.) Spring '03 of the game JUGGERNAUGHT (BNC number 1989IR) (GM is rdesper@eagle.wesleyan.edu/Rick Desper) Due Jan 23 Spring '02 of the game TOKUGAWA (BNC number 1989IS) (GM is joseph_harold_thomas@cup.portal.com/Joseph Thomas) (Still missing Spring'01 results) Will be published soon, had to replace two players. (Turn may not be due until tommorrow. Not sure about his.) Spring '03 of the game PETAIN (BNC number 1989IT) (GM is ssmith@ms.uky.edu/Scott Smith) Due Jan 7 Autumn and Winter '02 of the game DUNKIRK (BNC number not known) (GM is sjzwange@phoenix.princeton.edu/Steven Jacob Zwanger) Due Jan 20 Spring '01 of the game BIG WILLIE (MNC number not known) (Blind game, GM is okamoto@hp-ses.hp.com/Jeff Okamoto) Due Jan 19 Publisher comments: Quote taken from He Who Shapes by Roger Zelany Despite having a record 140 active players, I am having problems due to the winter vacations. If you think that you would like to standby, please let me know! I have enough people for another game but I don't want to start games without a sufficient pool of standby players. Also remember that signing up for my variants of gunboat, blind, 1914, and classic Diplomacy would also be helpful. The following has had the games section omitted because it was so big. If anyone would like to see it, send me e-mail. ***************************** * BEEN THERE, DONE THAT #10 * * November 1989 * ***************************** Good evening, and welcome to another edition of BTDT. A slimmer one this time, perhaps, but nevertheless we shall strive to meet your exacting standards of gaming and general all-around zine-like enjoyment. Why a slimmer issue. Ah, glad you asked. If you recall, as last we met and partook in the good fellowship of zine-ness, I mentioned I was working on the new issue of the venerable Zine Register, recently liberated by me from Ken Peel. At that time I mentioned sick kids, a vacation, lots of out-of-town teaching, general bad jujube type stuff at work, a wife going back to work after maternity leave, and other assorted excuses as impediments to my "blowing" Peel "out of the water," (his words) and putting out my first issue on time. And yet, in my cockiness and enthusiasm I predicted an on time ZR despite it all! Hah! I won't bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that the ZR takes a HELL of a lot more work to finish up than I imagined, and my life has gotten nutsier than I anticipated. And so... still no ZR. And a BTDT deadline arrived. So I had three choices: 1) keep plugging at ZR and let BTDT be quite late; 2) do a full, bloated BTDT like the last few and let ZR be REALLY late; or 3) drop ZR briefly, do a thinner BTDT, and then get back to ZR shooting for Dec 1 in the mail, and a big, fat, juicy BTDT over New Year's. After consulting with my WordPerfect/LaserJet guru and co- publisher of sorts, Ken Hill, I've opted for number 3. And yet this won't be all that thin. ONly by the ridiculously inflated standards set by the last two bloated beyond control BTDTs. Remember, this all started as a 4 page subzine. And even my first solo issue, not that many months ago, was only 12 pages. By the time I get done with the games, the Houserules for all the games which I need to run this time, a few letters (anything that was sent electronically so I can quickly and easily cut 'n paste it into the file), and an announcement of this year's Rusty Bolts Awards (pre-typed), this will no longer be objectively slim. And yet a lot of good material is held over until next time: Steve Courtemanches article on the development of Eurorails, Garrett Schenck and Allan Calhamer with yet more on the Fugs, an article rejected by Politesse giving the feminist perspective on the Rolling Stones concert in D.C. (wasn't it nice of Wrobel that even though he rejected it for his nasty, brutish, 1830-only zeen, he copied it entirely over in his own handwriting), my scathing analysis of WARTHOG's rampant sexism, David Orne's obscure music trivia quiz, two perspectives on perhaps the most historic day in Dipdom since Boardman thought "gee, I wonder if anyone'd want to play this by mail," - the meeting of Jimmy Williams and Mickey Preston, Mickey's "Diary of a Stab," Francois Cuerrier on, well, the importance of being Francois, Vince Lutterbie foaming at the mouth trying to be a modern day bad boy, and, hopefully, the great George Mann - David Orne debate which will be featured in BTDT - does pro wrestling have ANY social function whatsoever? Plus lots of letters. So sit back, relax, meditiate on the concept that by the time you see the next BTDT I shall have left my job to enjoy "semi-retirement" in my mid-30s, and eat your hearts out! Been There, Done That is a somewhat relaxed schedule, every five week postal gaming zine mostly devoted to the play of Diplomacy, its variants, and Railway Rivals. Diplomacy was invented by Allan Calhamer and is distributed by Avalon-Hill, and Railway Rivals was invented by David Watts, and was, until very recently, distributed in the US by Games Workshop. BT,DT is available from the editor/publisher, Tom Nash, who resides at 5512 Pilgrim Road, Baltimore MD, 21214. (301) 254-2836 (don't call between 9 and 10 PM, It's my daughter's bedtime!). CIS PPN - 74676,3310. The cost is .75/issue, or $6/10 issues, for the incredible savings of $1.50 if you sub for 10 issues! All players and current standbys will continue to get the zine free, for now. Letters and articles will earn sub credit at the rate of .75/page. So play and/or write, and you get the damn thing free! Trades are actively solicited, but I am probably already trading with you for the Zine Register. Hey, that's cool, send me two copies of your zine in return for ZR and BTDT so I have more for those hungry novices who request the North American Zine Bank sample! Formatting assistance, laser printing, and general all-around spiritual guidance provided by Ken Hill, publisher of The Armchair Diplomat, to which BTDT is still, and shall remain, a subzine. Game Openings: Regular DIplomacy. In anticipation of Choo Choo Coleman ending soon, now taking applications for the next game. Game fee - $5. Signed up: Kakritz. Six needed. That's all! Welcome this issue to: John Kakritz, Neill Goltz, Randy Davis, Steve Sulzby, Michael Lowrey, and David Hambley. ----------------------------------------------------------------- 1989 North American Rusty Bolts Awards That's right folks, it's that time of year again! Time for the only North American Dip Poll where vote buying, graft, and fraud, are not only acceptable, but eagerly encouraged. Simon Billeness, still smarting over David Harrington's inability to import the Labor Party to U.S. politics, decided as an alternative to import Britain's #1 crooked poll of the foibles of the PBM Dip hobby to our shores, and ran last year's North American Rusty Bolts in his zine Excitement City Unlimited. Since that time, Simon has burned out of the hobby, leaving oh, such a void where the Bolts had been. AS part of my master plan to be the American Doug Acheson, and totally and completely take over the hobby by mid-1990, I have applied to Simon, and after undergoing the same sort of rigorous background search into my character, persoanality, belief system, etc., that I had to endure to receive custodianship of Zine Register from Peel ("You want it? When? It's yours. Sure you don't want it earlier? Who are you again? Can you spell that?"), I am now the official North American Rusty Bolts Custodian. Therefore I formally announce the 1989 North American Rusty Bolts nomination period is commencing! I am taking nominations in the following categories: 1) The "Let's put Tri and Ven right next to each other, I mean what harm could that do to those countries" It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time Award. I myself nominate Larry Peery's DipCon scoring system used in San Diego this year. 2) The Blunt Instruments Memorial Award, for most eagerly anticipated or wished for fold of the year. 3) The Patience of Job Award for the year's most unreasonably delayed zine. I nominate Fiat Bellum, Dark Mirror, Perelandra, The Scribblerist, and Praxis. 4) The Fred Davis-Bruce Geryk Memorial Hobby Odd Couple Award, for the most bizarre hobby collaboration. One must include both Hopcroft-Wilson, and Hopcroft-Carrier here. At this rate, I'll have to name the award after Mike next year. 5) The MNC Dead Horse Memorial Award for most overdone and boring topic of hobby correspondence. My nominations: MNCs, the Runestone Poll, Canadian nationalism and seperate BNs, and "those PBMers don't give us any respect" by the PBEMers. 6) The William Whyte Award for most unique and truly distinctive hobby personality. I nominate Jimmy Williams. 7) The "Well, hey, I'm a hey, well, English major, with hey, well, a Bachelor's Degree in hey, English, well, hey" Don Williams Memorial Award for butchering the English language. 8) The GunBoat Award for stupidest hobby craze. 9) The Running Down to a Fold Award for most depressing hobby concept. 10) The Mark Walsh Memorial Cannon Fodder Award for most totally incompetent play of PBM/PBEM Dip. (named for a PBEM player who is legend among that community for the exquisiteness of his bad play). 11) The Flame Out of the Year Award. Nominations must include Mark Lilleleht, Audrey Jaxon, Michael Hopcroft. Who else? Billeness? 12) Who, Him Again? Award, for letter writer you are most tired of and bored with. My nominations are Marc Hanna and Mark Nelson. Please send all nominations for these, and any other categories worthy (or not!) of being included in this august (or November for that matter) poll by the date of the next BTDT deadline, Dec. 29, 1989, to me. The final nominations will be listed at that time. I will limit it to 5 nominees per category (unless bribed otherwise), and will therfore list nominees who receive a higher number of nominations over those who receive a lower number. The rules for the actual voting will be simple: everyone gets one vote per category. You can give it all to one nominee, or split it up fractionally any way you want. Bribery and vote buying are perfectly acceptable. All I need is confirmation from the vote seller that you have indeed sold the right of your vote to the buyer, and the buyer's vote. Is this clear? If so, I better rewrite it so as to confuse you all terribly.... ZINE NEWS: Formal fold announcements include Praxis, finally and cleanly, and, surprisingly, High Inertia, the popular subzine to Rebel. It appears that Michael Hopcroft has folded NUTMGS, not so cleanly however. No formal word has ever come to the players or subbers. Michael has basically dropped out of sight since his role in the KGO Zine Directory escapade of this summer. For awhile he stayed involved in games, though the zine was MIA, but recently he's NMRed all over. Vince L., may be time to step in. And speaking of folds, Mark Lilleleht, the man I made my reoputation bashing, is now 3 months late with his "final blow- out" issue of The Scribblerist. Some guys NEVER learn! I guess Mark's roving subzine which was to be the successor to TS wil never see the light of day either. Tim Moore's latest word to me is that although he is going ahead with his Moire as a separate zine from it's former parent and missing for well over 4 months Dark Mirror, it is his belief that Audi Jaxon will be putting out DM regularly again. The DM games which Tim carried briefly in his new zine, causing, apparently, friction between the two, will run, much to Paul Milewski's consternation, in both zines for one issue, then be transferred back to DM for good; unless of ocurse the same problem resurfaces in the future.... Michael Lowrey is taking over as editor/ publisher of Carolina Command and Commentary, effective immmediately. This is in preparation for David Hood's eventual taking on Larry Peery's role at Diplomacy World. David will continue to GM the games he is running in CCC, but Michael will assume the rest of the burden right away. As for the switch at DW, I've heard different dates for when that will happen. My purely subjective impression is that David would like it to happen sooner than later, while Larry's preference is to wait until after DipCon in June. Still no word on when an issue of the KGO Zine Directory, of the Brad Wilson "official Sacks" variety may come out. Brad's zine, Vertigo, has re-appeared after a summer lay-off of considerable length, with two quick issues, the latter of which was the biggest ever. As usual, Brad comes out a fussin' and a feudin' with a blast at Peery and the DipCon site selection process. Again as usual, tucked away amid the fighting words are some serious and well-considered ideas on improving the process. Chris Carrier has stated he is unsure of the future of his version of KGO ZD. Ironically, despite the past blasts at Carrier in Vertigo, and the polar positions they have taken on the KGO ZD affair, Carrier and Wilson appear almost as buddies in the Vertigo lettercol, united as it were in their antipathy for Peery. Ken Hill, editor/pubber of the oldest zine of the PBEM hobby, The Armchair Diplomat, has launched a new electronic zine, Electric Trains. It features PBEM railroad games on weekly deadlines. Tom Swider is GMing a game of 1830, I am running a Railway Rivals game, and Dick Martin is on tap to run the next 1830 game. Don Del Grande has switched the name of his long running zine Life of Monty, to A Sharp Mind and a Straight Knife (honest!). He states he was planning to do it anyway, possibly in a couple of months when he reaches issue #100, but the recent death of founding Monty Python member Graham Chapman, gave him the reason to go ahead and do it now. Cathy Ozog continues to use her soopn to be folded Cathy's Ramblings as a forunm for some self-flagellation of the most disgusting variety. Cathy, we all know you are the height of unhipness already. The repititious mea culpas are not a pretty sight however. Stop rubbing your own face in it already, OK? I'm opening up a treatment center for the terminally unhip, and you can come be the first patient. I love a challenge! Jason Bergmann is offering free copies of Entropy to anyone who writes me a post card or letter saying: "Nash, you Turkey, vote for the E/F/A draw in Formalhaut." Don't ask. Jason, so far only person's done it. Now, if you offering free issues of BTDT... A BRIEF LETTER COLUMN: Jim Shapire (Milwaukee): "I have had the pleasure of reading 2 issues of BTDT and find that as a first venture into PBM gaming I have no real idea as to how it stacks up against others of the same genre. I have been playing PBEM Diplomacy on a number of different systems (local and national) for under a year and it took the likes of you and Blau and Leamons, and others to take a look at the NO E (PBM) version. "While much of the zine makes a great deal of sense (hey, I'm 40 not senile), I would venture to say that much of the insiders' humor must be lost on me. So that novices to the zine as well as the genre aren't lost, may I make a suggestion that there be a glossary added to be used as a point of reference for such times as when a name or appelalation (eg Great K-Mart Satan) appears. "I am not looking to an inclusion of the entire process as to how nicknames are gained, but rather some reference as to who they are pointing to. I began playing Dip back in the mid 60's as a regularly scheduled Sunday morning adventure during my high school days and then picked up again in the past few years. With the rest of the world moving toward D&D and other variations on the theme, it's nice to be back with "real people" and concrete playing pieces <g>. None the less, I would appreciate if the next issue (or whenever possible) of BTDT include some editorial commentary as to who the heck these people are and why they think I should believe them when they tell me that they will not move into the Channel <g>." ((Jim, you think BTDT is bad, take a look at Kathy's Kornor sometime. You don't need a glossary, you need a English-KK dictionary! Seriously though, all you really need to remember is: Steve Smith = embodiment of all that evil; Jeff McKee = emodiment of all that is silly, trivial; Cathy Ozog = embodiment of all that is unhip; Ed Wrobel = embodiment of all that is geeky games addict (I mean the guy takes notes during Civilization so he can write articles about it!); Tim Moore = embodiment of all that worships me and and seeks to emulate me in every way (has supplanted McKee in average number of mentions of my name per issue); Ken Peel = embodiment of all that has, frankly, outlasted its usefulness; Don Williams = embodiment of all that is power hungry and mad with desire to imose his pathetic will upon the hobby; Jimmy Williams = embodiment of... uh, well... hmmmm.... something or other; and Steve Smith = emodiment of malicious evil (that's the most important one to remember!). You should never believe him when he tells you he isn't moving to the channel.)) Ken Peel (Silver Spring): "Wow! Number Nine (number nine, number nine, number nine...) was spifferino! Looked good, Hell, WAS good, even though it only mentioned my name three or four times... Now, if only that McKee guy would wake up and realize that you are leaving him totally behind in the dirt. One detraction, though. Tell Hill to deep six that fixed-spacing font you used. Proportional spacing or die, I always say! "So, you are depending on Cathy Ozog getting you her submissions on time for the international zine section? Yeah, Biggle's (by the way, that's Simon Billenness'British nickname) predecesor tried that, and it wasn't a raving success. She never claimed to be anything but a chip off the old Toadfather's block in the school of casual dipping. "I agree with your view on the often negative impact on novices of S&T articles, such as those in MOD, Super, and the GG. There are so few absolutes, that those articles can serve a novice negatively by convincing them that there are certain things they shouldn't even consider doing. In MOD, I think the play-of-the-game country articles are mostly a waste of space, with the exception of Stafford's article on France and Mill's article on Austria -- the former because it is an article that speaks of possibilities rather than limitations, and the latter because it is simply the funniest article in the whole publication. "You call ME a Milquetoast (first coined by Olsen, I'm afraid). Yeah, I guess feud wimp too, but at least I occasionally actually have opinions. You really ducked and swayed in response to Ed "Mr. Ed" "Fast Eddie" "First Citizen" "Egg Man" Wrobel. What I want to know is why your "Nash Rants" response to McKee Raves #2 got printed before #2 itself? It's about as easy to figure out as reading a BBS thread in reverse. "So what I want to know is why Hood -- a dedicated Macophile and ever-so-serious dipster -- has not bothered to test the waters of PBEM, which from everything I can tell, is a medium distinctly superior to regular PBM, both for its speed and for its high level of diplomatic content. I mean, players actually negotiate with each other at a serious and rapid pace! Shhhhh... maybe he'll hear us if we talk to loud, and attempt to spread the gospel of supply side gaming to yet another forum! Ixnay, okay? " P.S. Get a center stapler, if you are going to stick with digest! "Yeah, the ZR is a lot of clerical work. Once I finished it, though, I always wondered exactly what took all the blood, sweat and tears, as I'm a lightening fast typist. In retrospect, I think it was a simple matter of logistics. There are so many papers to organize, shuffle around, zines to double check, etc. The way I would organize the effort is to stack all the zine info sheets in alphabetical order, then pile all the zines in "A", "B", "C", etc. stacks. I would grab the next info sheet, double check the zines to be sure there there isn't a zine in an earlier alphabetical order that I didn't have a sheet for, collect the zines that match the sheet, check the latest issue to see what games are open (I usually took the sheet's word for it on games running, as that was a lot less important), check the frequency of publication to keep the pubber honest, and flip through a few of the zines to see if I could get some last minute inspiration for some pithy comment. Oh yeah, I also checked the zines as they came in for any zine reviews written by other pubbers that I could lift, and would store those separately from the other zines. "Yeah, yeah, now that I think of it, a *Hell* of a lot of logistical bother. The actual writing was the fun part, and I had a real feeling of accomplishment once the thing finally got duplicated and mailed." ((Yeah, the organization part is what's got me. When I get a night free to work on it, I find myself spending 45 minutes looking for that copy of The Prince or something that just came in a couple of days ago so I can update the "issue number." Before I know it, I've spent a couple of hours on the project, and have next to nothing typed. Well, McKee Raves was written a day or two before Nash Rants. But due to me sending BTDT through electronic mail to Ken Hill for him to print, then sending me back the masters for me to xerox and mail, the lag time got McKee's zine in the mail before mine. BTW - Ken's got the font fixed. Should look nice as you reading this. Pete Sullivan sent me a bunch of up-to-date reviews of British zines, so thet're the ones, besides my own, that I'll be using. Who me? Duck 'n sway? Whatever do you mean?)) Tom Swider (Collingswood): "Just got BTDT #9 in the mail -- looks good except the fonts get a little crazy to read in your letter column. Are you changing between a proportional and non- proportional font? I KNOW my eyes are due for a checkup but I thought I'd let you know how I felt anyway. Consider Sue to be the inspiration of my comments <grin>. "I think Jeff McKee is really a pseudonym for Bob Olsen. "Personally, I think having a RR map of Iowa is REALLY scraping the bottom of the barrel. As for the rest of the states, I think the same can be said. Regional approaches seem more interesting. What's next? RR maps on the CITY level??!?!? If so, I'll start working on the Endwell and Collingswood maps next... "FYI: Ed's allusion is to none other than Bruce Linsey. "I'm not old, I'm not burnt out, and I don't fart! <grin> "Steely Dan gets 5 stars -- as does Jimmy Buffet. "Sounds like your job is a real cake walk <grin>. The only t-group exercise I've participated in was something called PROCESS -- and it was talking and sharing experiences, not mountaineering. Imagine some Diplomacy people doing the Team Beam (Martin/Welter, Nash/McKee, Wrobel/Davis, Caruso/Hood). Imagine ALL THE CASUALTIES!" ((Heehee. I love it. Apparently David Watts has aniother game called "Bus Boss" which I've never seen but which I imagine to be like RR on a city map, as I believe it involves building bus routes on a street map of a city. I could be wrong however....Jimmy Buffet, BARF! If McKee is Bob Olsen that kind of makes me Don Williams... and that idea scares me so much I think I'll drop it fast!)) ----------------------------------------------------------------- I am enjoying moderating this zine, keep that mail coming! Eric Klien Up