Diplomacy zine -- Chapter Four From: Eric_S_Klien@cup.portal.com Date: Wed, 13 Dec 1989 04:33:43 +0000 Issue #122 of ELECTRONIC PROTOCOL: Chapter One contains: NAVARONE, BLITZKRIEG, OPERATION OVERLORD, GETTYSBURG, and HMS HOOD And is published by daybell@aludra.usc.edu/Donald Daybell Chapter Two contains: DRAGONSLAYER, BISMARK, COLD WAR, JACAL, TRENCHFOOT, and VERSAILLES And is published by tedward@cs.cornell.edu/Ted Fischer Chapter Three contains: TANNENBURG, VERDUN, ENTENTE, MULHOUSE, and DAWN PATROL And is published by dragon@agora.hf.intel.com/Bill Wheeler (He has been compiling the chapters but has so far been unable to get them back to me. We are working on the problem.) ------------- Chapter Four ------------- Fall '04 of the game RATATOSK (BNC number 1989IJ) (GM is jall@diku.dk/Mogens Jallberg) England: -------- Orders: [ A StP -> Mos ] [ A Nwy -> StP ] F NAf SF WMe -> Tun [ F WMe -> Tun ] [ F MAO -> WMe ] [ F NtS SA Nwy ] disbanded Builds -1: F NtS Position: A StP, A Nwy, F NAf, F WMe, F MAO Centers 5: London, Edinbourgh, Liverpool, Norway, St. Petersburg France: ------- Orders: A Bur S German A Mun [ A Gas -> Mar ] [ A Mar -> Pie ] A Pie -> Tus F GoL SA Pie -> Tus Position: A Bur, A Mar, A Gas, A Tus F GoL Centers 5: Paris, Brest, Marseilles, Portugal, Spain Germany: -------- Orders: A Pru SA Sil A Sil SA Mun A Mun SA Sil A Ruh SA Mun A Kie SA Mun A Liv -> Ber F Bal CA Liv -> Ber Position: A Pru, A Sil, A Mun, A Ber, A Ruh, A Kie F Bal Centers 7: Berlin, Munich, Kiel, Denmark, Sweden, Holland, Belgium Italy: ------ Orders: [ A Tyr -> Pie ] A Gre -> Ser A Boh S Turkish A Gal -> Sil [ A Vie -> Tyr ] [ F TyS -> Tun ] [ F Nap -> TyS ] [ F Tus -> GoL ] retreat to Rome Position: A Ser, A Tyr, A Vie, A Boh, F TyS, F Nap, F Rom Centers 7: Rome, Naples, Trieste, Budapest, Tunis, Vienna, Serbia Russia: ------- Order: A Mos H Position: A Mos Centers 1: Moscow Turkey: ------- Orders: A Tri -> Ven A Ukr -> War A Sev S Russian A Mos [ A Gal -> Sil ] [ A Rum -> Gal ] [ Bul -> Rum ] F Ion S Italian F TyS -> Tun F Con -> Aeg Builds +1: A Con Position: A Sev, A Gal, A Ukr, A Rum, A Con, A War F Aeg, F Ion Centers 9: Constantinoble, Ankara, Smyrna, Bulgaria, Rumania, Greece, Sevastopol, Warsaw, Venice Status: ======= Turkey : 8 Germany, Italy : 7 England : 6 France : 5 Russia : 1 Austria : 0 The next deadline is Thursday December 21 @ 20:00 GMT. Please send me information on when you are able to play in December and January. Thank you and good luck Mogens Spring '05 of the game BUSHIDO (BNC number 1989IN) (GM is ronin@cory.berkeley.edu/Sam Parazette) Not received. Summer '03 of the game HUGO (BNC number 1989IO) (GM is willis@trwind.ind.trw.com/Willis Marti) Diplomacy - HUGO Fall 1903 ========================== England: A Holland Support F North Sea --> Belgium Fails (Germany) F North Sea --> Belgium Fails (bounce) F Skagerrak --> Denmark Fails (1-1) F Wales --> Irish Sea OK F London --> English Channel OK Germany: F BAL support F BER - KIE Fails (Russia) F BER - KIE Fails (bounce & own unit) A KIE - HOL Fails (1-1) A RUH - MUN Fails Russia: A GAL - BOH OK A PRU - BER OK (2-1) A DEN - KIE Fails (1-1) F SWE - BAL Fails (1-1) F BLA S F ARM - ANK OK F ARM - ANK OK Turkey: F ANK disperses to the hookas Dispersal OK... Austria: A Mun S RUSSIAN A Den-Kie Fails (Germany) A Tyr S A Mun H OK A Sil S RUSSIAN A Pru-Ber OK A Tri thank the Italian fans for leaving OK F Con S ITALIAN F Smy-Aeg (out of boredom Fails (No such order) Italy: F Tus - GoL OK F TyS - WMe OK F Tun - NAf OK A Pie H OK A Ven - Tus OK A Gre - Alb OK F Smy H OK France: F ECH->MAO OK F PIC->BRE OK A BEL S English A HOL H Fails (England) A MAR->SPA OK A BUR->MAR OK --------- German F BER must disband Turkey F ANK must disband Results: England:(5) F IRI F ECH F NTS F SKA A HOL 0 Germany:(1) F BAL A KIE A RUH -2 Russia: (9) F SWE F BLA F ANK A DEN A BER A BOH +3 Turkey: (0) 0 Austria:(7) F CON A TRI A SIL A TYR A MUN +2 Italy: (6) F NAF F WME F GOL F SMY A PIE A TUS A ALB -1 France: (6) F MAO F BRE A BEL A MAR A SPA +1 ***Builds/disbands due Sunday. I will publish new locations asap afterwards, then by popular demand, we will have a "real" winter until next move ( S '04 ) due 14 Jan. Please stay with us, as this is getting interesting(sorry, Turkey) Too many people will be without email over Xmas break. I will be available the entire time. ======================= The Weekly Crier "All the news that fits, we print." =================================== An excerpt from ITALY Today (TM) - page 3 "A chipshot away" According to our Emperor, last Thursday Italian forces "moved to within a sandwedge of France." In order to prove his point, sources report, the Emperor took a quick trip to the Piedmont region yesterday, to actually try to hit a sandwedge into the French province of Marseilles. Sources close to the Emperor say that the Emperor hit the shot "a little fat" and that the ball did not actually make it into France, "although," one source adds, "he took out a pretty good divot." No one would confirm the rumor that the Emperor, after missing his shot at France, teed a ball up and tried to "carry the Med" with a three-wood. PARIS(AP) -- MASS EXECUTIONS ORDERED In a press conference today, King Jordan announced that all people who's first names are "Fred" or who enjoy Spaghetti should leave the country within 24 hours, or be executed most painfully. The protests from some members of the listening crowd were quelled by proficient use of the guillitine. Amsterdam (UPI): ``The Royal Army was severely reprimanded for leaving its post last season in Brussels and moving northward on its own accord. Provisions have been made to rectify this error.'' Brussels (AP): ``The Belgian government, in concert with the wishes of the King, announced that all visiting French troops would be escorted back to Picardy under the supervision of Royal Navy, North Sea Division. It is believed that the errant Frenchmen, who should've remained at their station in Iberia, are needed to defend the southern frontier and must be defended at all cost, hence the British concern.'' LONDON (Times): In late-breaking news, the First Sea Lord announced there would be delays in coordinating the French move from Belgium. Sources said weather in the North Sea prevented necessary maneuvers. (Budapest) Fred the Dust Mite, royal press secretary, reported today that there is no news in the whole of the Austrian Empire. "Nope, none at all," he is qouted as saying. Back to you, Zaphod... PARIS (UPI): Spokesman for the Surete recently disclosed receipt of Austrian troop dispositon from derF, an exile from the Austrian court. "They always treated me as a backwards country boy" he complained. " Now I get even." Austrian sources declined to comment. SYRIA (PU): The Turkish-caliph-in-exile today announced acceptance of foriegn rule of his country. "I just wish they'd make up their minds as to who's in charge." KIEL (AP): Kaiser What's-his-name announced the execution today of his War Minister for "gross negligence". The Foreign Minister stated his regrets shortly before boarding the plane. Fall '02 of the game JUGGERNAUGHT (BNC number 1989IR) (GM is rdesper@eagle.wesleyan.edu/Rick Desper) ENGLISH IN MOSCOW?! TURKEY, AUSTRIA JOIN THE RUSSIA BASH! TURKS QUIETLY SLIP INTO IONIAN UNOPPOSED! TRENCH WARFARE IN BELGIUM RESULTING IN STALEMATE. England (Protoolis) France (LeBrun) A StP->Moscow A Mar S A Bur F Nwy->Sweden A Bur S A Pic->Belgium F Nwg->Barents [A Pic->Belgium] (Germany 2-2) F Nor->Norway F GoL S FSpaS->Western Med F Eng->North F SpaS->Western Med Germany (Scardamaglia) Italy (Walker) A Ber S A Munich F Wes->TyS A Mun S A Berlin [A Tusc->Ven] bounce A Ruhr S A Bel [A Tyo->Galicia] ILLEGAL MOVE A Bel S A Ruhr [A Ven->Tyrolia] bounce F Den S English F Norway->Sweden Austria-Hungary (Silver) Turkey (Litvin) F Trieste holds A Gre->Albania A Vienna s F Trieste A Bul->Rumania A Budapest-> Galicia A Con->Greece A Serbia S Turkish A Bul->Rumania F EME->Ionian F Aeg Convoy A Con->Greece Russia (Kottmann) A Galicia->Warsaw A Silesia S A Prussia->Berlin [A Prussia->Berlin] (Germany 2-2) F GOB->StP [F Rum holds] DISLODGED! Press: From Russia: NKVD released the following war report: Operation Barbarella continues, with the Glorious Russian armies marching on Berlin. France is expected to join in the festivities, with a picnic between the two conquerers on the Elbe in the spring. The Germain Kaiser was reported to have said !$&%*#& when told of the victorious advance of the Imperial armies. Closer to home, the reports of an English invasion have been greatly exaggerated. "There are a few scruffy englishmen in the north, but nothing our women and children can't handle" said the Czar in his morning audience, which was held at 3pm yesterday. The Czar has reportedly made deals that will result in the destruction of England in a year or two. "What can a little island do against the Russian empire?" sniffed the Czar in his dinner audience, held at 11 pm last night. Berlin (AP)- The Kaiser is reported to be in poor health, which may account for the lack of movement amoung the German armies. The Minister of Defence reports that he has held numerous and frank talks with the Tsar and has high hopes that an understanding has been reached that will allow Russia to withdraw her troops from German territory. Failing that, said the Minister, there will be no alternative but all out war between the two countries. It has also been reported that the English Foriegn Minister was seen lunching with the Kaiser recently. When asked about this, sources for the Kaiser did not deny the meeting and cited the history of mutual help the two countries have given each other and the hope for continued success of both nations. from England: The President of the Fedral Republic of Great Britain made the following broadcast today on BBC Radio Worldwide. "My fellow Britons, I am pleased to announce that today the Peoples Parliament has passed a resolution outlawing Russia forever. The attack begins in five minutes." "Today the Republic has shown the world that we are a Shining City atop a Hill standing against an Evil Empire. The forces of Great Britain will today take possession of Moscow, destroy it's archaic monarchy and guide the people of Russia to a new future of freedom." "We do this, not as an act of war, but as an act of peace and of brotherhood. We do this for the good of our fellow men in Russia, and in those parts of Eastern Europe that now languish under the jackboot of Russian domination." Retreats: (finally!) Russian F Rumania can either disband or retreat to either Sevastapol or to the Black Sea! Retreat due ASAP. Builds can be submitted conditioned on the retreat. I would prefer that. Builds due Tuesday 4:00 EST. Final positions: England: F North, F Norway, F Barents, F Sweden, A Moscow France: F Wes, F Lyon, A Mar, A Bur, A Pic Germany:F Den, A Ruhr, A Belgium, A Munich, A Berlin Italy: F TyS, A Tusc, A Tyo, A Ven A-H:F Trieste, A Gal, A Vie, A Ser Russia: F StPS, A Warsaw, A Prussia, A Silesia, F ? Turkey: F Ion, F Aeg, A Alb, A Greece, A Rum Control: England(6):LON,EDI,LPL,NWY,SWE,MOS builds 1 France(5):PAR,BRE,MAR,SPA,POR even Germany(6):BER,KIE,MUN,DEN,HOL,BEL builds 1 Italy (4):ROM,VEN,NAP,TUN even A-H (4):VIE,BUD,TRI,SER even Russia(3):StP,WAR,SEV debuilds 2 Turkey(6):CON,SMY,ANK,GRE,BUL,RUM builds 1 (GM's commentary) Things look grim for Russia. This guy playing Turkey is slick! And thankfully, Austria-Hungary has some hope for the time-being, which pleases all the fans of his prosaic press releases. Italy:Tyrolia and Galicia do not border. What are the outlooks for the holiday season? I personally will only be able to GM one more move before winter break, which will last until mid-January. If you want to keep playing, we could probably find a substitute GM for the interim. Feelings, suggestions? Rick Spring '02 of the game TOKUGAWA (BNC number 1989IS) (GM is joseph_harold_thomas@cup.portal.com/Joseph Thomas) (Still missing Spring'01 results) Two players were replaced, game delayed. Fall '02 of the game PETAIN (BNC number 1989IT) (GM is ssmith@ms.uky.edu/Scott Smith) ORDERS: Austria (Quarnstrom): Italy (Capwell): F ADR - Ion FAIL 1-1 F ION - Adr FAIL 1-1 F GRE - Aeg FAIL CUTS A APU - Ven FAIL 1-2 A SER - Gre FAIL A ROM - Tus FAIL 1-2 A Tri - VEN 2-1 A TYR S A Tri-Ven Russia (Jog): A Ven - TUS 2-1 F BLA S F BulE-Con F BulE - CON 2-1 England (Ames): F Nwy - NWG 2-1 F Nwg - Edi FAIL DISL F Swe - NWY F WAL S A Lon H A Rum - BUL F YOR - Edi FAIL A Sev - ARM A LON H A Stp - FIN France (Chow): Turkey (Bartlett): F Ech S Mao - IRI F AEG S F Con-BulE CUT F Mao - IRI F Con - BulE FAIL DISL A BEL H A Arm - ANK A PIC S A Bel H A Spa - MAR Germany (Hasting): F Bal - DEN F NTH S RUSSIAN F Nwy-Nwg A HOL H A PIE S AUSTRIAN A Ven-Tus Capitals indicate final position of the unit. Turkish F Con must retreat to Smy or disband. English F Nwg must retreat to Bar, Cly, Nao, or disband. Retreats are due 10 PM Tuesday night. ----- UNIT POSITIONS: Austria: A Ser Tus Tyr Ven F Adr Gre England: A Lon F Wal Yor (Nwg) France: A Bel Pic Mar F Ech Iri Germany: A Hol Pie F Den Nth Italy: A Apu Rom F Ion Russia: A Arm Bul Fin F Bla Con Nwg Nwy Turkey: A Ank F Aeg (Con) ----- CONTROL: Austria: [6] Bud Tri Vie Ser Ven Gre England: [3] Liv Lon Edi (Nwy) France: [5] Bre Mar Par Por Bel Germany: [5] Ber Kie Mun Hol DEN Italy: [3] Nap Rom Tun Russia: [9] Mos Sev Stp War Rum Bul Swe CON NWY Turkey: [2] Ank Smy (Con) ----- BUILDS/DISBANDS: England: Disband 1 Germany: Build 1 Russia: Build 2 Turkey: Disband 1 Builds and disbands are due Tuesday 10 PM. They may be made conditional on the English/Turkish retreats. ----- PRESS: Geneva: The Russian steamroller kept rolling. England and Turkey were forced to retreat due to the Russian attacks. Spain remained the only neutral country when the French occupation forces withdrew to Marseilles and the Germans invaded Denmark. Italy was forced on the defensive when all three of its moves failed because of the Austrian invasion of the peninsula. ---------- Vienna Probe ( All the news that's fit to primp) Young Prince Herman Gotterdamerung, in an effort to help his father's war effort today became engaged to the daughter of another world leader. His hope was that the political alliance would help his father gain new territory. Unfortunately, the country he chose was Guyana. In an effort to help his embarrassed and somewhat comfused son, Emperor Gotterdamerung declared war on Guyana's neighbor, Brazil. ---------- Vienna (Free Associative Press) Emperor Gotterdamerung dispatched a long letter to the Czar of Russia. F.A.P. was given portions of the letter, and they are quite conciliatory. In one section, the Emperor explained that his speech befor the Gotterdamerung Youth was written after imbibing over 35 pints of Budmeister. He explained that he clearly beleives that a Russian Austrian conflict would be counter-productive to both nations. The Emperor proposed a floating summit in the Black Sea to discuss the partition of Turkey and the Balkans. The Emperor is said to be eagerly awaiting the Russian reply. ---------- The Associated Press is reporting massive riots in the streets of London. The populous is apparently highly unsatisfied with the conduct of the war effort by the English government. ---------- Bulgaria: The hit single "Here I Come Constantinople," by the American band The Residents climbed to number one on the Bulgarian charts today. This is largely due to the large number of call in requests to radio stations from drunk Russian sailors. The song goes something like this: Here I come Constantinople. Here I come Constantinople. I am coming Constantinople. Here I come ... ---------- Madrid, Spain: Guerillas of the Spanish National Front have defeated the French attempt at occupation for the second straight year. The French were obliged to pull out of Spain because of the heavy casualties the SNF was inflicting upon them. Juan Valdes, spokesman for the SNF and the Colombian Coffee Growers, says, "I am confident that my men will keep Spain a free and independent country. We want to be like Switzerland." Sources say that the French High Command is planning to invade and conquer the entire Iberian peninsula in 1903. "The withdrawal of French forces from Spain was not due to the SNF wimps that think they are an army. We were concerned with the growing crisis in Italy and wanted diplomatic leverage with the occupiers. We are not cowards," said our source in the French High Command. ---------- Vienna (Free Associative Press) An excerpt from an interview with minister of defense Vastenblunder. FAP: What about the Germans and the English? MOD: Clearly the Germans and the English are trying to dupe the world into beleiving that they are at war by having Germany absorb England. It is my opinion that they are actually allied. FAP: And the Russians? MOD: People are concerned about a Russian invasion of Austria, but I tell you categorically that it will not happen. FAP: Why? MOD: Because there is not enough Vodka in the world to sustain the offensive required to defeat Austria. FAP: Are the Italians now allied with the Turks? MOD: Who cares? It is not a matter of importance. FAP: Are you concerned that the French might ally with Italy. MOD: Yes, in the same way as I am concerned that someday I will have prostate problems. In other words, it may happen and it would be very annoying, but right now I have other things to worry about. ---------- Munich Journal - Fall 1902 issue. The first Munich Armed Division fights on for the land of Germany. Continued maneuvers with Austria are drawing to a possible close. The Kaiser mentioned something about a bloody stalemate in Italy. ---------- Berlin Times - The Danish people welcomed the Berlin First Fleet with open arms as the commander of the force, Hans Fredrick, said to the roaring crowds, "Just passing through! Thank you very much!" ---------- Kiel Killer news - The Fleet of our homeland has crushed the enemy of England. Now they wait for the English to capitulate. ---------- The Spanish Derelict : The French Army has been seen practicing their movement in ranks for the last several weeks. What does this mean? ---------- Greek News: est. 534 B.C. Today, the Fleets of the Austrian Scum were seen packing their bags to go. The crowds cheered the thought of no more drunken bum sailors. The Emperor's son was too loaded to comment. Eva Gabor called the action "Simply Marvalous Darling!" Mozart is dead and is expected to stay that way. Socarates' class will be postponed til next week due to the absence of the instructor, again. ---------- Venice Probe (all the news) Late last night the mayor of Venice, Luigi Linguini, was shot and killed by an unknown assassin in the mayoral apartments on St. Mark's Square. "This is a deep tragedy, for the city and the province and for the people in Europe who strive for peace," the Deputy Mayor, now acting mayor, Anton Pavelicelli, told reporters. Signor Linguini was widely respected for his grasp of political and economic affairs, and before the Liberation, had been touted by Venetians as a prime candidate for Foreign Minister, only to be passed over for the inexperienced current Minister. He had been preparing to act as liaison from Venice to the Austrian court, to plead the case for annexation. He is survived by a wife and two daughters. ---------- MOSCOW: (Novosti Press) The English fleets have gone back ashore for the Royal Wedding, but no further information has been forthcoming about the alleged Royal wedding. Rumors abound that the wedding may take place amidst the safety of Edinburgh castle rather than the expected Westminster Abbey site. Grand Duke Dmitri's delegation representing Russia at the Wedding has reported great progress. The Grand Duke received support from the German delegation that is already in the North Sea, and was able to secure provisions in Norway. There were the usual cheering crowds in Oslo as Russian sailors marched in. The elite Kremlin Guards spent the summer in St. Petersburg, and are now reportedly on the march to Finland. Moscow: The Grand Patriarch of the Russian Orthodox Church has called for the removal of Prince Smirnoff for his failure to liberate Armenia. He renewed his call for a Crusade to reunify the five Orthodox Churches of Moscow, Yerevan(Armenia), Sofia, Constantinople and Greece. He alleged that Prince Smirnoff was a Papist sympathizer whose his real loyalties lay with the Hapsburgs. Sevastopol: Prince Yakov Smirnoff launched yet another offensive to liberate Armenia, but the there is no word yet of the outcome. The promised Azerbaijani divisions have not yet materialized, but the Prince appears more sanguine of success by his naval forces. "The Grand Patriarch should spend his time praying for the success of Holy Russia's armies," he said, "not fomenting unrest amongst the populace in Moscow". Moscow: The crisis over the Austro-Hungarian annexation of Venetia-Romagna continues. The Czar is disgusted with the sleazy behavior of those in power in Vienna, and has repeated his offer that the Emperor abdicate in favor of Prince Herman. The Trans-Siberian railroad is believed to be running satisfactorily, despite the pressures of the war effort. Student demonstrators continued their protest outside the Austrian embasssy. The Czar also continues to press for an Austrian withdrawal, and troop movements to Warsaw have been rumored. ---------- The Leech'n'Sting Tatler ------------------------ Monaco - The winning lotto numbers for the fall 1902 2.9 billion franc Monaco State Lottery: 03 04 07 19 22 53 54 69. Rumors abound of another major French naval build up. In the British Isles: Two's company, three's a crowd. Spring Fashion Preview: Coffee and Danish will be out the Kuerfurstendamm, Swedish pancakes will be trendy. Our resident astrologer's predictions: All the perfumes of Ankara (sic) will not sweeten one bloody hand. ---------- What's there to say? Death to all enemies of the Sultan. ---------- Vaduz -- The Prince of Liechenstein commended the German Empire for the disarmament of Munich. "I have been striving many years for a weapons-free zone in Central Europe, and now, with German help, the plan has finally got going." He expressed confidence that neigh- boring countries, especially Austria-Hungary, would not take advantage of the zone, and called on them to expand it further. ----- DEADLINE: The deadline for retreats and builds will be 10 PM Tuesday 12 December. The deadline for Spring 1903 moves will be Saturday 7 January. Summer '02 of the game DUNKIRK (BNC number not known) (GM is sjzwange@phoenix.princeton.edu/Steven Jacob Zwanger) Publisher comments: *********************************** Scribed by rlg@ai.mit.edu/Bob Givan *********************************** The Stab-Stab: Milk It for All It's Worth, Baby! from Voice of Doom #85 So you've just stabbed your neighbor; or, as you might prefer to say, violated an agreement you had regarding your common frontier. What do you do next, in terms of negotiating with your victim? Some players don't write at all, reasoning that since the trust has been broken there is no point to further communication. If your time or energy for writing letters is limited, the fine; it is true that there are other players more important to you at this point than your victim, so writing to him now gets low priority. But if possible you should make the attempt. Other players write a letter apologizing for the stab, and/or giving their reasons for it. This is always a courtesy and it can even have a practical value in that it may make the victim a bit more receptive to future overtures from you, should they become necessary. But often the best thing to do is to try and milk it for all it's worth. That is, put on your smoothest tone, apologize for not trusting him and promise to the stars above that you will back off since you (obviously) made a mistake, discuss the tactical details of how you can disengage with a minimum of risk to either party; and then (if you haven't by now talked yourself into a change of plans), stab for his guts the next turn! It's surprising how often a resourceful diplomat can get away with this (perhaps because such changes of heart are far from unheard of). A skilled, experienced player will probably defend himself regardless of what you say, but players with somewhat less experience may be more gullible. Aside from the satisfaction of suckering someone twice in a row, your position can be strengthened further by the second stab if the guy truly believes you are going to withdraw. And even if you fail, what have you got to lose (aside from a little more credibility)? Diplomacy is a game of inches; play it that way and grab for all you can by whatever means you can! A simple example will suffice. You, as Russia, have just opened to Galicia in violation of an agreement with Austria. If you think he's at all the gullible type, and you want to try for one of his two reachable home centers, don't write a simple "sorry-I-stabbed-you-and-good-luck" sort of letter. He can easily keep you out of both Budapest and Vienna if he knows you're going to keep coming. Instead, write a letter like this: "I'm really sorry that I didn't trust you to keep our agreement concerning Galicia. I suppose we should have arranged to bounce there. Anyway, I know you have every right to be suspicious of me---I brought this on myself through my own unfounded fears---and I won't object should you choose to protect yourself from me this turn. But since you were sincere, I will use Army Galicia to support myself to Rumania, and then I will move it to Silesia next spring...". You get the idea. If Austria doesn't bite, you're no worse off than you would have been, except you will have that much more difficulty getting him to believe any of your future statements. And if he does fall for it, then you have at least given yourself a 50-50 shot at taking one of his home centers, where you might easily have had no chance. The stab-stab is just one of many negotiational techniques you will acquire (and learn to recognize in your opponents) as your gaming experience increases. Next month: the stab-stab-stab (useful only against Bob Olsen). -------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- Taken from Voice of Doom #85: How to Reject an Article without Starting a Feud With the Poor Sap by Mark L. Berch Bruce casually mentioned recently that he had rejected an article written by Rod Walker. He thereby revealed what is not really a secret, but more like a little-known fact: pubbers do reject articles. It's quite possible that the entire incident was made up, a bit of hobby theater if you will, just to get this point across. Pubbers in those circumstances do have some need for a way to break this gently. Here are two suggested letters: Dear Reginald, Your article on the French opening was far and away the best article on openings that I have ever seen. If I were to publish it, I'm certain it would revolutionize the way France is played. Although, as you point out, the opening has occasionally been used, the arguments that you marshal for it are so powerful that I'm sure at least 2/3 of the French players will want to use it. This will cause the play of France, and thus the entire game, to become very stereotyped. It will also cause great problems for GMs who rely on country preference lists, since France will suddenly be in great demand, and England, Germany, and Italy will plunge to the bottom of the list. Unscrupulous GMs may resort to asking a higher game fee for those playing France. I'm sure you can easily imagine other problems which may arise. As much as I'd like to run your article, I cannot take the substantial risk of destroying the game and thus the entire hobby by printing it. I hope you'll understand. Prudently yours, P.S. Please sign me up for France in you next game opening. Obviously, that P.S. is an optional feature. The next form letter would be of a more general nature; you could use it for any type of article. Dear Chastity-Diligence, I was enthralled with your recent article. It is by far the best article I've ever seen, inside or outside the hobby. I would be delighted and honored to publish it. However, if I were to do so, it would be quite impossible for me to ever publish another article of inferior quality. Alas, articles of this stature appear only once every ten years at best. Through no fault of your own, however, it is not possible to publish a dipzine with a publication schedule of once every ten years. It just cannot be done. Thus, were I to run your article, I'd be forced to shut down the zine right away. I'm sure you do not want this to happen. I hope you'll understand. Unsuicidally yours, I'm sure that you can come up with variations on this theme. The main principle, however, is that the article is much too good to be published. I am enjoying moderating this zine, keep that mail coming! Eric Klien Up