SUMMIT OF E-WRESTLING CARD #2

From: laramee@IRO.UMontreal.CA (Dominic Laramee)

Date: Thu, 11 Jul 1991 23:20:17 +0000

SUMMIT OF E-WRESTLING ROYAL RUMBLE
	------ -- ----------- ----- ------

(Live, from Buffalo, NY)

Baboon: "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the second card
 of this very first Summit of E-Wrestling! This is Baboon Tempest, your host
 for the night; my guest analyst will be none other than Admiral Chekov, the
 very successful manager of the Ultimate Trekkies! Hello, Admiral!"

Admiral: "Hello, Baboon! This Royal Rumble is a big event, and we have tons
 of superb wrestlers in it: the Four Corners, the longest-reigning WeWF
 champion in history Frank Steel, the new PWGeA North American champion
 the Aztec Mummy, Metallicus and Fury of the Mage's Gallery, and, of course,
 my own Romulan Mauler and the Living Legend of Fantasy Wrestling, the Tholian
 Black Widow!"

Baboon: "I suppose, Admiral, that you will predict a victory for one of your
 men?"

Admiral: "As you know, Baboon, my Trekkies have a fairly weak record in
 Battle Royals; the Romulan Mauler placed rather high in the Team Challenge
 Series battle royal, but the others... No, in fact, I have to go with
 Frankie Steel. Mauler and Black Widow are simply not at ease with this kind
 of match."

(enter Rusty Nose.)

Rusty: "And ah think that Bjorn thah Sweedish Pratzahll will win this one,
 as he did last time!"

Baboon: "Hey, Nose! What the hell are you doing here? Nobody told me about
 this..."

Rusty: "Keep yo' cool, Baboon... Ah'm onley here to work, see?"

Baboon: "Grumble... Well, you better keep quiet, or else..."

Admiral: "Gentlemen! Please! We will have enough action in the ring, we don't
 need any in the commentators' booth!"

Baboon: "Ho... Yeah, you are right, Admiral. We have some interviews to present
 before the Royal Rumble begins, so let's go to Green Jean Oktoberfest in the
 locker rooms!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Green Jean: "Thank you Baboon! I am with Sargent Glasnost and Tomahawk, better
 known as the Hammer and Sickle. Sargent, your thoughts on this Rumble?"

Glasnost (wearing red amateur tights and a shaved head): "Royal Rumble! 30 men
 battling! The Superpower of wrestling will win! Glasnost #1!"

Tomahawk: "My partner here is an underdog in this thing. We know it. The problem
 is that many people know it, too, and are not likely to be paying much
 attention to him. Well, beware, hotshots, because it won't matter that
 Sargent Glasnost is a jobber when he bumps you through the arena's roof!"

Green Jean: "Sargent Glasnost will be the twentieth wrestler to enter the
 ring tonight! Let's go to The Patriot!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Patriot: "Thank ya! My guests at this time are the Ultimate Trekkies,
 Romulan Mauler and Tholian Black Widow. Gentlemen, after what you did in
 Chicago last night, your minds must be focused on tomorrow's
 tag-team tournament!"

Mauler: "Yeah, I guess we are not really 100% ready for tonight. But you
 know, Patriot, that the Ultimate Trekkies always fight like raging bulls,
 no matter what!"

Patriot: "Hey, sure I know! I lost two World tag-team titles to you and the
 Photon Torpedo in the old PWGA!.. Now, let's talk about the Royal Rumble.
 The two of you have not been terribly impressive in the WeWF Summer League;
 however, you did score a tremendous victory over Singh and Vador last night.
 do you think you can restore your reputations tonight?"

Black Widow: "Yes, we definitely can. Jimmy Vendetta, I will be gunning for
 you, and I hope to put an end to your stupid comeback ideas. And after I
 throw you over the top rope, I will go on to win the Rumble, because..."

Mauler: "The Ultimate Trekkies always prevail!"

Patriot: "Let's go to Sunn Mooner!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Sunn Mooner is standing with three wrestlers, an old man in military
attire, and several AK47-wielding stormtroopers.)

Sunn: "Thank you, Patriot. Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce my guests,
 who are mostly new to e-wrestling, the manager, Dick Tator, and his proteges,
 Randy "Rock'n'Roll" Hurricane, Bamm Bamm Gigolow and Jimmy "The Body" Vendetta.
 Dick, this is the first time your men..."

Tator (as his stormtroopers point machineguns at Mooner): "First of all, it is
 not Dick: it is MISTER Tator to my friends, and Your Excellence to you!
 Second, the fact that the Hurricane and the Bamster have never fought in
 one of your e-federations before has no relevance, because we will win
 anyway."

Hurricane (looking pretty much like Michael PS Hayes, but with Jim Garvin's
 hair): "It doen't matter WHO it is, or WHERE it is. All that matters is that
 it is not going to be pretty!.."

Bam Bam (a Bigelow look-alike, surrounded by gorgeous chicks): "Unlike my
 face, which is the prettiest thing on Earth. Frank Steel! Sargent Sledge
 Hamburger! After you lock up with the Bamster, you will know that looks CAN
 kill!"

Vendetta (gray haired, but still in good shape): "Black Cockroach! You got
 away pretty clean at the first PWGeA SuperCard, but your luck has run out.
 You and your Mauler buddy beware... the Vendetta is always on the loose!"

Sunn: "Take it away, Wince McLady; boy, these guys sure know how to not make
 friends!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wince: "And my next guest doesn't have many friends in the world of e-wrestling
 either. Although he has been retired for several months, thanks to the efforts
 of Sword and Shield, his name is still spoken in hushed tones in the WeWF.
 Tonight, he has left his Hollywood residence to attend this card from a front
 row center VIP seat. He is the Hellhound, Rick Schroeder. Hellhound Rick,
 may I ask you to tell me he reason of your presence here tonight?"

Hellhound: "If I demanded this interview from you, McLady, it was certainly
 not to discuss the proper way to cook cauliflower. I, the Hellhound, do not
 feel bound in any way by the special stipulations of the match that the Sword
 and Shield luckily won away from us. I will therefore PROBABLY return to
 active wrestling shortly, bringing death upon the ranks of unbelievers.
 Hail Kali! And now, leave me alone, McLady!"

Wince: "Hellhound, just another question..."

(The Hellhound's rottweilers jump on McLady, who barely escapes with his life
as teh Hellhound summons them back to him.)

Hellhound: "I SAID: 'LEAVE ME ALONE'! Next time, I may not call them back..."

Wince: "OK, OK!... (he moves away in a hurry)... Let's go talk to somebody
 less dangerous... I see Gentleman Jim Nice at the other end of the guests'
 booth, let's have a few comments from him.... Hello, Gentleman Jim!"

Jim: "Hello, Wince! Glad to see you!"

Wince: "Jim, what are your predictions as to the outcome of this Royal Rumble?"

Jim: "It may sound lame to remind you of the importance of the draw in the
 Rumble, Wince, but it is crucial nonetheless. The best wrestler, if he draws
 number 1, does not have a snowball's chance in Chernobyl of making it to
 the end. If Cowboy Kevin Puckett draws a good number, he will win it; if
 not, Sargent Sledge Hammer or The General."

Wince: "Thank you Jim; now, back to Baboon Tempest for the blow-by-blow!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Baboon: "The Hellhound would make a comeback? But where? In the WeWF? The
 PWGeA? The EMWA?"

Chekov: "One thing is sure, though: if the Hellhound resurfaces, Sword and
 Shield will be right after him!"

Baboon: "The Royal Rumble is about to get underway, as the first wrestlers
 make their way to the ring... I see Tom "The Animal" Brown, coming down the
 aisle to thunderous jeers from the crowd..."

Chekov: "Apart from the Four Corners and maybe Baron Von Klaw, I do not know
 of any active wrestlers who are more hated than this one!"

Baboon: "And here comes Frank Steel, the two-time former WeWF World Champion!
 The crowd is on its feet!"

Rusty: "And we bring it to you, all Live and in Cullah!"

Baboon (fuming): "SHUT UP! YOU SAY ONE MORE WORD AND I..."

Chekov: "The Royal Rumble begins! As the bell rings, Tom Brown charges Frankie
 Steel and nails him from behind with a clothesline... The Animal, stomping
 away op the former champion... Steel stumbles back to his feet, and smashes
 an elbow in Brown's face!... And a whip to the buckle.... and a Hiptoss by
 Frank Steel!"

Baboon: "Brewster Cogburn, the former EMWA Intercontinental champion, is the
 third man to enter the ring, and he charges Frank Steel from behind with
 an axehandle, as Tom Brown rolls away into the far corner... Haymaker by
 Cogburn! And a DDT!... Tom Brown has recovered and he and Cogburn whip
 Frank Steel to the ropes... Laredo Lariat by Cogburn!.. Frank Steel is hurt...
 Here comes Hoosier Daemon... Tom Brown assaults him as he enters the ring..."

Chekov: "Cogburn is looking good so far tonight, better than he has in a LONG
 time!"

Baboon: "Cogburn picks up Frank Steel by the hair... Signals for the Bulldog
 Supreme!... BANG! HE NAILS IT!"

Rusty: "This could be lights out for Frankey!"

Baboon: "Cogburn dumps Frank Steel over the top rope! Frank Steel is the first
 man eliminated from the Royal Rumble!"

Chekov: "This doen't look too good for his shot at Bjorn "The Sweedish Pretzel"
 and the U.S. title, next week!"

Baboon: "Indeed!.. Another wrestler making his way to the ring... It's the
 former PWGeA North American champ, and one of the Shadow Assassins, Ricky
 Dangerous!... Meanwhile, Tom Brown and Daemon have been hammering away at
 each other, and Brewster Cogburn has been taking a rest in a corner...
 Dangerous moves in to attack Daemon as well... Cogburn joins the slugfest
 BUT RICK DANGEROUS SUCKERS HIM INTO A NECKBREAKER!"

Chekov: "There are no friends in a Rumble, Baboon!"

Baboon: "Seeing the advantage, Daemon and Tom "The Animal" stop their
 fighting to pick up Brewster Cogburn and dump him over the top rope! Two
 men out!"

Chekov: "And Brewster, who already has blooed feuds with half of the PWGeA,
 throws a killer glance at Rick Dangerous!"

Baboon: "The crowd gets on his feet to greet the next participant, Lightning
 Bolt!... The Bolt runs to the ring, JUMPS THROUGH THE ROPES and shoulder
 blocks Tom Brown, who flies into Rick Dangerous!.. Daemon and Lightning Bolt
 quickly shake hands, and deliver a devastating double clothesline that sends
 Tom Brown flying over the top rope!"

Chekov: "I guess that there ARE friends in a Rumble, after all; do not expect
 this alliance to last too long, though."

Baboon: "Rick Dangerous, sensing the danger, retreats into a corner... Daemon
 dropkicks him in the face! Ricky D slumps against the ropes... And LIghtning
 Bolt delivers a stunning Stinger Splash on him!... Here comes the General,
 our next participant!"

Chekov: "The General is Daemon's manager! Lightning Bolt and Rick Dangerous
 will be at a serious disadvantage!"

Baboon: "I guess the Bolt realizes this as well, because he bounces off the
 ropes and lifts a knee into the General's face! Daemon tries to interfere, but
 Ricky Dangerous levels him with a kick to the midsection, and KOs him with
 a piledriver!"

Rusty: "Speking of pall-drivahs, Lightning Bolt has got the General in position
 for the Electric PallDrivah..."

Baboon: "AND KABOOM! The General is out cold, and I could have sworn that I
 saw a flash of lightning as his head hit the mat! Lightning Bolt picks up
 the General, and eliminates him easily!"

Chekov: "I guess the General's injuries are catching up with him finally!"

Baboon: "Here comes Sargent Sledge Hammer, the man who held the PWGeA World
 Belt for the federation's first six or seven weeks of existence!.. He sees
 the General, already eliminated, and doesn't look too pleased, Admiral!"

Chekov: "The two of them teamed up just last night in Chicago, and they
 probably had planned on working together tonight as well, especially since
 they had drawn consecutive numbers!"

Baboon: "Daemon is on the top turnbuckle and Superflies onto Rick Dangerous!..
 Sledge Hammer and Lightning Bolt are going at it at the other end of the
 ring... Daemon gets up and dropkicks Bolt in the back; Sledge picks up the
 surprised Bolt and powerslams him into the mat!... Rick Dangerous is back on
 his feet catches Sledge Hammer in a sleeper hold, but Daemon hits him from
 behind... Here comes Johnny Vicious, Rick Dangerous's partner!"

Chekov: "And suddenly, the tide of the match has changed again, and it is now
 in favor of the Shadow Assassins!"

Baboon: "Sledge Hammer and Daemon double suplex LIghtning Bolt... The
 Assassins pick him up and execute a perfect double body slam!... Lightning
 Bolt is fightning one on four at this moment... Johnny Vicious whacks him
 with HIS piledriver, and dumps him out! LIghtning Bolt is eliminated!"

Chekov "There are never more than four or five men at a time in the ring,
 tonight; quite unusual!"

Baboon: "Ricky D and the Sargent are slugging away at each other... Daemon
 executes a beautiful crucifix on Johnny Vicious, and follows him to the
 floor with a splash!... Here comes The Neutralizer... He gorilla-presses
 the prone Johnny Vicious, and clotheslines Daemon for good measure!..."

Chekov: "LOOK OUT! Sargent Sledge Hammer just nailed Ricky Dangerous with
 his patented mule kick off the ropes, and eliminates him with a shoulder
 throw over the top!"

Baboon: "For the rest of ther Rumble, wrestlers will enter the battle two at
 a time... Here are the new arrivals: The Plaid Powerhouse and Randy "Rock
 'n'Roll" Hurricane!"

Chekov: "A good occasion to see what Jimmy Vendetta's new croonies are capable
 of!"

Baboon: "The Neutralizer delivrs a high vertical suplex on Johnny Vicious....
 Meanwhile, the plaid powerhouse locks up Daemon in a bear hug... Randy
 Hurricane climbs to the top rope... Flying Lariat on Sledge Hammer!...
 Neutralizer back-body-drops Vicious, but Hurricane quickly jumps on his head
 and power bombs the big man!"

Chekov: "Here come two more men: Prof. Wolfman and The Crusher!"

Baboon: "Randy Hurricane greets the Wolfman with a handspring headbutt!..
 The Crusher looks for an easy kill; Johnny Vicious is down; so Crusher
 drops a knee to his sternum, and tosses him over the ropes! Randy Hurricane
 whips Wolfman into the ropes...Belly-to-belly suplex!.. Wolfman is out, so
 Hurricane suplexes him over the top rope as well... Daemon is losing a test
 of strength to the Plaid Powerhouse..."

Chekov: "Here come Mr Mercury and Cowboy Kevin Puckett!"

Baboon: "The Crusher pushes Sledge Hammer over the top rope, but the Sargent
 hangs on to it and climbs back into the ring without having set foot on the
 apron, so he is still alive... Mr Mercury climbs to the top rope and starts
 running over them to taunt his rivals! Mercury Rising!"

Chekov: "Not exactly a brilliant move, here... Mercury is out of his mind!"

Rusty: "Some bad muthas say he never had a mind!"

Baboon: "Crusher is now slugging Daemon, who has been in the ring for quite a
 while now... The Neutralizer and The Plaid POwerhouse are double-teaming
 the poor Cowboy Kevin with fists and feet... Randy Hurricane gorilla presses
 Daemon, and throws him ONTO Mr MERCURY, WHO WAS STILL RUNNING ON THE TOP ROPE!
 BOTH MEN ARE ELIMINATED!"

Chekov: "Impressive demonstration on the part of Randy Hurricane, but Mr
 Mercury's arrogance is what really killed him!"

Baboon: "The next two participants, Mr.B and The Romulan Mauler, are now
 entering the competition... Sledge Hammer belly-to-back suplexes Randy
 Hurricane, who is showing signs of fatigue... The Romulan Mauler body slams
 the Plaid Powerhouse, and locks him into the torture rack; Cowboy Kevin
 leaps off the second rope and drops an elbow on Double-P. "

Rusty: "All this action is brought to you by LIve and In Cullah Inc., the
 company that pays me tons of money to mention its name all the time on
 national television!"

Baboon: "I SAID SHUT UP! IF I HEAR ONE MORE 'LIVE AND IN COLOR', I WILL..."

Chekov: "Sledge Hammer and The Neutralizer team up to lift Randy Hurricane
 and dump him over the ropes! He is out of it!.. Mr.B bites Cowboy Kevin in
 the face!.... The Romulan Mauler slugs The Crusher with a double fist to
 the head, and a gutwrench suplex!... Plaid Powerhouse whips Sledge Hammer
 into the ropes, and the Neutralizer pulls them down, so Sledge bounces over
 them! He is eliminated!"

Baboon: "The Romulan Mauler picks up the Crusher in a piledriver position and
 climbs the turnbuckle! He is on the top rope... TOP ROPE POWER BOMB! The
 Plasma Torpedo knocks the Crusher out cold, and the Mauler eliminates him
 with one hand behind his back!... Here come Hoosier Erik and Metallicus od
 the Mage's Gallery... Hey, Admiral, the Mauler is looking good so far!"

Chekov: "My teams will cause a lot of upsets in the tournament, tomorrow night!"

Rusty: "And Gentleman Jim Nice is having a few words with Crushah, outside the
 ring! They are coming to blows right now!"

Baboon: "Haymaker on the Neutralizer by Metallicus... Cowboy Kevin is in
 trouble with Mr.B, but the Mauler decks the B from behind with a face slam
 into the mat... Erik picks up the Plaid POwerhouse and clotheslines him on
 the top rope!.. Mauler and Erik double slinshot suplex Plaid Powerhouse,
 who goes flying into the third row of the stands!..."

Chekov: "But there are still three other members of the Four Corners who are
 fresh in the locker room!"

Baboon: "In comes Sargent Glasnost, accompanied by Prof. Spewmaster...
 Metallicus clotheslines Cowboy Kevin... The Mauler lifts the Neutralizer in
 a fireman's carry, and dumps him over the top rope, but Mr.B hist him from
 behind, and Neutralizer grabs the Mauler's arm to eliminate him as well!...
 Sargent Glasnost whips Metallicus into the buckle, and levels him with the
 Russian Sickle... Prof. Spewmaster lets out a shout, and starts SPEWING
 EVERYONE IN SIGHT! Mr.B is caught by the Spewmaster's green mist; he jumps
 over the top rope, screaming in pain, and rushes back to the dressing room!
 Metallicus is spewed as well! And Sargent Glasnost! Erik eliminates the
 helpless Metallicus, and Cowboy Kevin gets rid of Glasnost!"

Chekov: "Only 3 men remain in the ring: Cowboy Kevin, Spewmaster, and Erik!"

Baboon: "Two more men rushing in... IT'S THE INTOXICATORS, BudMan and DiMadMan!
 They storm the ring, carefully avoiding Spewmaster's breath, and go to work
 on Erik!... Cowboy Kevinand Prof. Spewmaster are going at it in the other
 corner... BudMan climbs to the second rope, DiMadMan places Erik in position
 for a piledriver, and BudMan spikes it! Intoxicator! Erik is eliminated by
 DiMadMan, and the Intoxicators assault Cowboy Kevin!"

Rusty: "All this action, brought to you Live and In Cullah by Live and In
 Cullah Inc... Hey, Baboon, what are you doing?"

(Baboon rips the electric cable connecting Rusty's mike off the plug and
whacks Rusty on the head with Jim Duggan's two-by-four, which, once again
for no particular reason, happens to be at ringside)

Baboon: "Two more wrestlers are entering the ring: Bamm Bamm Gigolow and
 the new North Anerican champion, The Aztec Mummy!... The Mummy is posing
 for the crowd... AND IS IMMEDIATELY ELIMINATED BY A DROPKICK FROM COWBOY
 KEVIN!"

Chekov: "The North American champ lasted exactly four seconds!"

Baboon: "The Spewmaster spews DiMadMan; he and Cowboy Kevin double backdrop
 BudMan into Bamm Bamm, and eliminate DiMadMan! Bamm Bamm powerslams BudMan
 and sits on him! All 350 pounds of Bamm Bamm Gigolow, smothering BudMan
 to death!... In come Fury and the Tholian Black Widow!"

Chekov: "This means that the two last wrestlers to enter ther rumble will be
 Jimmy Vendetta and Bjorn "The Sweedish Pretzel"!"

Baboon: "Fury assaults Cowboy Kevin Puckett; forearm to the head! And a legdrop!
 The Black Widow finishes off BudMan with a few chops, a vertical kick to the
 left shoulder, and a sommersault dropkick off the ropes! BudMan is out!...
 And Fury eliminates Cowboy Kevin with a crescent kick behind the head!...
 Spewmaster misses Bamm Bamm with the spew, and hits Jimmy Vendetta who was
 entering the ring, along with US Champion Bjorn!... Vendetta doesn't see a
 thing, thanks to the spew in the face... Black Widow sneaks up on his from
 behind and locks him up into the Spider's Web, his own sleeper hold!..."

Chekov: "Look out! Bjorn has just delivered a crushing knee breaker on Bamm
 Bamm, and applies the Sweedish Pretzel!... Bam Bam cries in aginy.... AND
 THE HELLHOUND, RICK SCHROEDER, CLIMBS INTO THE RING AND HITS HIM ON THE
 HEAD WITH AN INTERNATIONAL OBJECT!"

Baboon: "Are we the only ones who saw this?... Anyway, Bjorn tosses the limp
 Bam Bam over the top rope, and the Hellhound beats him up some more...
 Meanwhile, The Black Widow has put Jimmy Vendetta to sleep with the Spider's
 Sting, and Spewmaster is dropping knees and fists to The Body's head...
 Fury hits SpewMaster from behind with a spinecrusher... And a gourdbuster!...
 Fury whips SpewMaster to the ropes... Claw hold!... And a standing dropkick!..
 Bjorn "The Sweedish Pretzel" attacks The Black Widow, but misses with the
 clothesline (everybody misses with the clothesline; there has to be one
 missed clothesline in every modern match) and gets nailed in the back by
 a Kung Fu Atemi..."

Chekov: "Fury has just eliminated Spewmaster... Only four men remain in the
 ring: Black Widow, Bjorn, Fury and Jimmy Vendetta... On second thought, let's
 say three and a half: Jimmy Vendetta is not worth much right now!"

Baboon: "Indeed, he is still very much asleep... And the Black Widow picks him
 up... A few slaps in the face to wake him... Black Widow body slams Jimmy
 V into Bjorn's back! Bjorn turns around, sees Jimmy Vendetta, thinks that he
 has attacked him, and locks him in the Sweedish Pretzel!... Fury and
 Black Widow locking up... Side Suplex by Fury!... Black Widow off the ropes...
 Trips over the limp body of Jimmy Vendetta and falls neck first on the top
 rope!"

Chekov: "Come on, BW, COme ON!"

Rusty (painfully climbing back into his seat): "I won't say a word... promised..
 Just stop beating me up, OK?"

Baboon: "Fury monkey flips Black Widow... Bjorn releases the Sweedish Pretzel,
 and dumps Jimmy Vendetta over the top rope!"

Chekov: "Only three men left!"

Baboon: "Fury whips Black Widow into the buckle and follows him in with a
 running shoulder block... ESQUIVE BY Black Widow, and Fury KOs himself...
 Bjorn, relatively undamaged, moves in for the kill and picks up Black Widow...
 He throws the Tholian into the ropes... Back Body drop... Bjorn moves over
 to Fury... Fury off the ropes... Another back body drop!.. Bjorn picks up
 both of his opponents... Bashes their heads together, and Black Widow falls
 over the top rope! It's Bjorn vs Fury... Bjorn is in complete control...
 He nails Fury with the DDT!... Fury climbs back to his feet, stumbles to the
 ropes... AND HIS ARMS GET STUCK BETWEEN THE TOP TWO ROPES!"

Chekov: "It looks like Bjorn will have it easy, but he should be careful
 anyway!"

Baboon: "Bjorn bounces off the ropes and charges Fury WHO ESCAPES FROM THE
 ROPES AT THE LAST MOMENT!!! BJORN CAN't SLOW HIS MOTION AND FALLS OVER THE
 TOP ROPE!!! FURY WINS THE FIRST SUMMIT ROYAL RUMBLE!!!!"

Chekov: "What a great Rumble!"

Rusty: "All live and in... OOPS! I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING! WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT
 ME LIKE THIS????"

(Baboon proceeds to wipe the floor with Rusty's face.)

Chekov: "Fury is celebrating, to some cheers fromn this Buffalo crowd, who
 obviously enjoyed the Royal Rumble... The other members of the Mage's Gallery
 are making their way to the ring to celebrate as well... John Girder and
 Metallicus shower their partner with champagne, as the New Mystics carry him
 around the ring on their shoulders... Warren Hammer is working the crowd, and
 gets more cheers... Hey, wait a minute! What is this? Brewster Cogburn and
 Jack Moran are making their way to the ring; knowing their relationship with
 Metallicus in particular and the Gallery in general, this is NOT a good
 sign..."

Baboon: "... And suddenly, all Hell breaks loose! Jack Moran, The Black Knight,
 Baron Von Klaw and Running Eagle Feather rush the ring and assault the
 Mage's Gallery!... Black Knight knocks out the New Mystics with brass knuckles,
 while Jack Moran and Brewster Cogburn beat up on Warren Hammer with chairs!...
 Baron Von Klaw locks up the battered Fury in his deadly Klaw Hold, and draws
 blood from Fury's face!... "

Chekov: "And now, more wrestlers are rushing in to break up the onslaught...
 The Romulan Mauler, The Black Widow and Cowboy Kevin are escorting Fury
 back to the dressing room on a stretcher, while The Aztec Mummy and Mr Mercury
 lead a bunch of grapplers who are trying to separate the enemies..."

Baboon: "This isn't over yet, folks! All of these men will soon be in the
 PWGeA!"

Rusty (His face is filled with dirt, and his hair is whiter than ever): "And
 I am dead, and in black and white!" (He falls face first on the floor,
 unconscious)

Baboon: "Well, everybody, this wraps up our coverage of the Summit of
 E-Wrestling Royal Rumble; see you tomorrow night at the Montreal Forum for
 the Road Warrior Cup tag-team tournament!"

Chekov: "The Ultimate Trekkies will be there... to win."

References

AD&D PBeM
arxt@midway.uchicago.edu (The Fly that Bugged Me)
Wed, 10 Jul 1991 19:35:39 +0000