UEFL: Peripheral Division Results From: billones@grebyn.com (Jeremy Billones) Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1992 01:39:55 +0000 Peripheral Division Standings LP W L D GS GA CP TP Cash BOTH Amazing L. Lemmings 6 3 0 0 19 0 7.5 3 264 BOTH Hoary Marmots 6 3 0 0 14 4 6.5 4 365 BOTH Norwegian Conspiracy 5 2 0 1 10 6 12 3 221 EB SFWA Hawks 4 2 1 0 5 3 3.5 3 78 EB New Lions 3 1 1 1 3 7 6 3 161 EB Inuvik Ancient Vikings 2 1 2 0 10 10 5.5 4 85 EB Yungsten Yahoos 2 1 2 0 8 8 6 3 382 Amdahl Unlimited 2 1 2 0 5 7 2 4 514 Portland Pelicans 2 1 2 0 5 7 2 4 240 EB SC Lions 2 1 2 0 4 7 4.5 2 351 EB Drunken Stupor 2 1 2 0 3 17 5 5 173 Baggins Myrth 0 0 3 0 2 12 2.5 4 820 Auction Results: lot17 DS 247k Ki Rin Press: [DS] [Tom T. Nose, Bud Bowl, Milwaukee] Coach Eacker has warned the media here that the current roster has a lot of young players. They have a lot of heart, but he will have to see if they can pull together and get things rolling. Coach Eacker was attempting to bring in a new DF to bolster this young squad but was notified by Ki Rin that the sealed bids he received matched in value exactly, and that further info would be required of both the teams that had attempted to acquire his services. Hopefully the Stupors will be able to get Mr Rin on board as soon as possible. [SCL] Shannon (Ireland) - Well we did it... South Cork Lions have moved! Over the summer, management finally got fed up with Cork Co. officials and moved to Shannon, taking the name South Connacht Lions. Apperently, the major problem was over the renovation of the stadium, which was severely damaged last season by a Lemming. In any case, SC Lions picked up and moved north. "Shannon is the perfect spot. We have an international airport and a large city to support us. I finally feel at home." It should also be noted that Coach DeHora also stated that last season when they moved to Cork. (Reminiscient of Jack Morris) "The Lemmings will be coming into Lions Stadium for the season opener. And we will be ready this time." Some of the preparations for the match include fireproof seat cushions and an asbestos suit for Simba, the Green Lion. "No more pyromaniacs in this stadium!" The off season has taken it's toll on the mighty Lions. "We lost quite a few veterans. But the ones that stayed have taken the younger guys under their wings." Team Co-Captain Pete Kennaday, a 5 year veteran, was quoted to say, "I know I don't have much time left here, I just want to help the team out as much as possible." The other Co-Captains, Seamus O'Leary and Carlos Santana, reiterated the aging veteran's statement. "We gotta help out the new guys. Svenson, O'Mathers, Tone... They've been around for a year or so but they've still some learnin' to do. And Connoly and Cosgrave have to learn the system and get it together." "It's a whole new season, you can't tell much until you get a couple of matches under your belt," Coach DeHora was quoted to say when asked who was going to be the Lions' toughest opponents. "The Vikings and Conspiracy will always be tough, and likewise the Lemmings. We got a few more teams from reorganization that we haven't seen a whole lot of, ever. I dunno, it's going to be interesting." The Lions open their season in Shannon against the Lemmings and then travel to meet Baggins Mirth and Hoary Marmots. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [YY] ----------------------------------------------------------------- Yaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! After seeing the Yahettes on top of the WEFL, what can we do but try to follow the gals' example?!? Heck, I wonder if we can try get Carla to play for our team... Anyway, Clarabell is rarin to go, in all her bovine glory, so Yahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ----------------------------------------------------------------- [IAV] Inuvik Free Press: Coach Jon Bjorn Erikson and the Inuvik Ancient Vikings are pleased to be entering their second season in the UEFL. Only half the players who started the first season were still with the club when the Ancient Ones captured the Satellite Division Championship, and similar turnover is expected this year. This is especially true when one sees the holes aging has left in this club. While not expected to be a total loss, this year is a rebuilding one, and the Vikings hope to challenge for the division championship again next season. Victory, the Vikings polar bear mascot, is frisky as every, and looks forward to guiding the Ancient Ones to, well, victory. Coach Erikson is happy that Muammar Qaddafi, who is getting a bit senile, seems to have forgiven the coach for dropping him down on the team's depth chart. Team Captain Mathias Mohr hopes aging Michael Yordan, last year's Golden Boot winner in Satellite, still has the eyesight to aim a few more shots into the opposing net. All in all, this looks to be an exciting season! [HM] The Marmots opened up their fourth season and second in the Peripheral Disivion with much not much excitement. Aging coach Foghorn Leghorn feels that the front office made no effort to acquire any talent during the off-season. Due to some sundry post-production foul-ups, the seasons first issue of the Hoary Marmot Fan Club News will be delayed. [PP] The excitement is building at the North Sumner Sports Arena as the Pelicans get ready to take the field for their first season. Expectations are fairly low, as with any expansion team, but the play promises to be exciting and varied. Forza Verona! [ALL] Welcome back to Cliff Top stadium. Armed with a polar bear mascot, shared with the Vikings , the Lemmings are hoping for a good year. Good luck to the SC Lions and Marmots as well. (Teams tend to play Lemmings, Lions and Marmots in the same session so if the Marmots and Lions fire, it will be a torrid session for people). Free Agents will be posted Wednesday. Session B Schedule: (road) @ (home) ALL @ NL YY @ SCL BM @ AU HM @ IAV DS @ SFWA PP @ NC IAV @ ALL NL @ SCL BM @ NC YY @ HM AU @ DS PP @ SFWA ALL @ YY SCL @ IAV SFWA @ BM NL @ HM NC @ DS AU @ PP ******************************************************************************** Match 1 ******************************************************************************** Amazing Leaping Lemmings vs SC Lions 1 - 0 6 - 0 Rezvani (1) S. Sam L. (bk) ******************************************************************************** Hoary Marmots vs Baggins Myrth 4 - 1 4 - 1 Dibble (1;bk) Ironbrand (1) Phooey (1) Pig (1) Sylvester (1) Rocky (bk) ******************************************************************************** New Lions vs Norwegian Conspiracy 0 - 0 7 - 0 Kepler (bk) Hussein (bk) Pournaras (bk) ******************************************************************************** Portland Pelicans vs Drunken Stupor 0 - 1 0 - 2 Lite (1) Head (bk) ******************************************************************************** Yungsten Yahoos vs SFWA Hawks 0 - 2 0 - 5 Bujold (1) Matz (1) Sterling (bk) ******************************************************************************** Inuvik Ancient Vikings vs Amdahl Unlimited 3 - 0 6 - 2 McHartin (1) Radison (1) de Silva (1) Qaddafi (bk) ******************************************************************************** Match 2 ******************************************************************************** Norwegian Conspiracy vs Inuvik Ancient Vikings 8 - 6 9 -18 Thorsen (3) HP Gumby (2;bk) Nordmann (2) Keoti (2) Wickers (2) Mohr (1) Arild (1) Westwood (1) Hussein (bk) Escilla (bk) ******************************************************************************** SC Lions vs Hoary Marmots 1 - 6 2 -10 Kennaday (1) Coyote (2) Fancy (2) Doggie (1) Runner (1) Pig (bk) ******************************************************************************** Drunken Stupor vs Amazing Leaping Lemmings 0 -13 0 -16 Eray (bk) Blackhead (4) F. Frank L. (3) F. Fred L. (3) Rezvani (3) ******************************************************************************** Baggins Myrth vs Portland Pelicans 1 - 5 1 - 9 Javid (1) Disher (2) Citron (1) Ho (1) Pruitt (1) ******************************************************************************** SFWA Hawks vs New Lions 1 - 2 1 - 4 Shirley (1) Clyde (2) Bujold (bk) Piper (bk) ******************************************************************************** Amdahl Unlimited vs Yungsten Yahoos 5 - 2 8 - 9 Britton (2) Morris (2;bk) Grate (2) Perring (bk) Otaka (1) ******************************************************************************** Match 3 ******************************************************************************** Amazing Leaping Lemmings vs Portland Pelicans 5 - 0 11- 1 M. Michael L. (2) V. Vic L. (2) Welch (1) F. Fred L. (bk) L. Leroy L. (bk) S. Sam L. (bk) F. Frank L. [inj;spr] ******************************************************************************** Norwegian Conspiracy vs Amdahl Unlimited 2 - 0 3 - 0 Arild (1) Stark (1) Thorsen (bk) ******************************************************************************** Hoary Marmots vs Drunken Stupor 4 - 2 7 - 5 Ale (1) Doggie (1;bk) Steam (1;bk) Gorilla (2) Kah (bk) Mutley (1) Reserve (bk) ******************************************************************************** Inuvik Ancient Vikings vs SFWA Hawks 1 - 2 2 - 5 Reykjavik (1) Bujold (1) Escilla (bk) Matz (1) Sabre (bk) Piper [inj;brk] ******************************************************************************** New Lions vs Yungsten Yahoos 1 - 6 1 - 6 T. Tom L. (1) Jordan (2) Lincoln (2;bk) Harding (1) Norman (1) ******************************************************************************** SC Lions vs Baggins Myrth 3 - 0 5 - 0 Svenson (2) Achalla [inj;pull] Unglata (1) Barnabas [inj;conc] DeThorpe [inj;spr] D. Falk [inj;spr] Ghandi [inj;conc] Greylock [inj;pull] Ironbrand [inj;brk] McLuther [inj;conc] Tachyon [inj;lig] ******************************************************************************** (bk) Booked, 4 DPs (RC) Sent off, 10DPs (#) Number of goals scored [inj;*] Injured, type of injury Up