Re: ARENA restart

From: js138@cus.cam.ac.uk (John Sloan)

Date: Sat, 02 Oct 1993 01:38:44 +0000

It finally happened...

I reproduce this for your edification and delight.

Battle Challenge!  Wile E. Coyote versus Roadrunner.

VANCE: Good day!  I'm Vance Lance, saying hello and welcome to the
Arena, where the weather today is cloudy with temperatures in the
mid-80s.  A perfect day for a match.  The fanfare has this very moment
blown to signal the pre-fight warmups.  Our first fighter this
afternoon will be Wile E. Coyote.  He seems to be very popular with the
fans.  Wile E. Coyote is dressed in cloth ring.  He is holding a
lucerne hammer.  It says on my card that Wile E. Coyote describes
himself as "super-genius"  That certainly seems accurate to me.  His
competitor today will be Roadrunner.  I'm joined this afternoon by my
color commentator, Dirk 'Black n' White.
DIRK:  Hello.
VANCE:  You sure can talk, Dirk.  And there go the two competitors to
the center of the Arena.

Round 1.

Roadrunner circles slowly backward.
Wile E. Coyote performs a bold riposte slice!
Roadrunner cleverly evades the stroke.
Roadrunner performs a fearless riposte thump!
Roadrunner hits.
It's an insignificant thump to the left leg.
Wile E. Coyote and Roadrunner exchange blows.
Roadrunner seeks a possibility to swing.
Roadrunner advances to attack.
Roadrunner performs a bold downward cut!
Roadrunner's longsword renders a glancing cut to Wile E. Coyote's buttocks.
Wile E. Coyote readies himself to attack.
Wile E. Coyote makes a fearless stabbing blow!
Wile E. Coyote connects with his lucerne hammer.
It's a minor hit to the right leg.
Roadrunner pounds his weapon on the Arena floor.
Roadrunner performs a fearless upward gash!
Roadrunner strikes an unimpressive slice to Wile E. Coyote's right leg.
Wile E. Coyote directs a abusive gesture at Roadrunner.
Roadrunner makes a courageous upward strike!
Roadrunner hits.
It's a weak blow to the buttocks.
Wile E. Coyote executes a bold downward bash!
Wile E. Coyote's lucerne hammer applies an insignificant slice to
  Roadrunner's shield arm.
Roadrunner shifts to offense.
Roadrunner makes a daring stabbing attack!
Roadrunner strikes a slight slash to Wile E. Coyote's left leg.
Wile E. Coyote is humiliated!  Roadrunner is triumphant!
The Arena officials award a 5 gold piece trophy to Roadrunner.

VANCE: And that ends our battle of the day!  I hope you found it as
interesting as I did.  Roadrunner showed great stamina.  As for his
competitor, Wile E. Coyote used special tactics very terribly badly,
but made superb use of special tactics.  I don't think I have to say
anything else.  Would you like to add anything, Dirk?
DIRK: No.
VANCE:  Dirk, your perception never fails to amaze.  Signing off, I'm
Vance Lance with Dirk 'The Turk' White.  Good night, and keep your
sword edge bright!

References

Re: ARENA restart
srt@aero.org (Scott 'Dr. Pain' Turner)
Fri, 01 Oct 1993 20:54:07 +0000
Re: ARENA restart
bonder@netcom.com (Bruce W. Onder)
Fri, 01 Oct 1993 21:44:56 +0000

Referenced By

Re: ARENA restart
srt@aero.org (Scott 'Dr. Pain' Turner)
Fri, 01 Oct 1993 20:54:07 +0000
Re: ARENA restart
bonder@netcom.com (Bruce W. Onder)
Fri, 01 Oct 1993 21:44:56 +0000